Teacher: Okay kids, so today, we will be heading to the amusement park
Cody: GAY!.... Sorry, I just needed a reason to shout that
Teacher: …. Anyway, after our successful fundraiser, we managed to make a bit too much money. Instead of giving this to charity, the board of education remembered that having a soul isn’t cheap, so instead, they decided to use the money for a field trip to the amusement park, which was much cheaper than giving all the money away for charity
Wind: Glad to know I go to a school run Von assholes
Teacher: Me too. Now, I want everyone to line up in a single file line-
(All of the students run out)
Teacher: Why am I not shocked
James: Mine, I’m so excited. Maybe we can meet the girls at the water world. Du think any of them are wearing white T-shirts
Wind: Why are Du asking me. I don’t give a shit about an amusement park. It’s just a social gathering for idiots to go because they have too much money on their hands
James: Sheesh, Du avoid people like cancer
Wind: Well, if people are cancer, than that means I must have beaten cancer at least (Counts) twenty seven times. That’s Mehr than anyone with cancer can say. Glad to know I beat cancer.
Bus Driver: (Slams on the brakes, barely missing a small car) Were here (Finishes bottle of bier and throws it out of the window, hitting the car outside and breaking the windshield)
Wind: Yeah, good luck with the liver failure
Bus Driver: Thanks (Takes out another bottle of bier and starts drinking it)
Cody: Okay, so, what should we do
Wind: Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m going to catch up on some Lesen (Reads On the Origin of Species Von Charles Darwin)
Cody: (In ball ride) Please. Only a faggot baby would be scarred of a ride like th- (Gets launched into the air) AHHHHHHH!
James: (Sitting on a log ride) Alright (Sees two girls with white shirts) Oh god yes
(A large obese man sits right in front of James)
James: Oh come on
Miku: (Enjoying the karte, warenkorb ride) Well, this is ni- (A child on oben, nach oben of her drips ice cream onto her hair)
Amanda: Hold it! The Farben on the bumper cars are in an uneven amount. There are Mehr yellow carts than any other color
Worker: ……. Is it really that bad
Amanda: YES! Without order, do Du know what we have?
Worker: Sane people?
Amanda: Chaos! That’s What!
Hannah: (Throws ring at a bottle and misses) Damnit (Throws another one) Damnit (Throws the ring, getting it on there)
Worker: ….. (Kicks the bottle over, making it tip over and break) Sorry. Du lose
Hannah: ARE Du FUCKING SERIOUS!
Wind: (Reading a book)
Game Host: Come on up, everyone
Wind: (Annoyed) Will Du be quiet. I can’t read if Du are-
Game Host: Ah, sir. Would Du be interested in playing my game
Wind: I would rather play with a pack of rabid wolves
Game Host: Oh come now. Surely a man with your precise aim would enjoy a game like this
Wind: Alright, for fucks sake. What is it?
Game Host: Well, all Du have to do is take this gewehr here and shoot the aliens. Originally, they were going to be a different sort of “aliens”, but that’s bad for business
Wind: Alright (Hands him a dollar) If it will get Du to stop yelling (Aims the gun and fires) What the hell? This is a real gun?
Game Host: What can I say. I wanted my original game to be as realistic as possible. I even found some aliens, but no, still bad for business, so these cardboard cutouts will have to do
Wind: Alright (Shoots again, hitting every alien within three shots)
Game Host: Man, that’s some good shooting
Wind: Well, when you’ve been throwing rocks at rats to catch a meal, Du learn a thing oder two
Game Host: Well, if Du want to go again, go right ahead
Wind: Well…. screw it, why not
Wind: Well, damn. I’m all out of cash. Oh well, it was worth it. That was the most fun I’ve had in a long time. It was worth losing my ramen money for the week
Game Host: Glad to hear
Wind: (Walks off)
Game Host: I just hope I have enough money to replace the cardboard (Looks over at the cardboard aliens riddled with bullet holes)
Wind: (Sees the group) Hey, where were Du guys. I had a lot of fun at this place. I even won this badge (Shows a badge labeled “Border Patrol Champion”)
Cody: (Terrified) T-this place is fucked up. They throw people in the air like it’s a goddamn madhouse.
James: (Crying) My wet T-shirt dreams. All lost
Miku: (Her hair is covered in different sweets) Those little bastards threw a bunch of Süßigkeiten in my hair. It’s gonna take days to get this out
Amanda: (Angered) This place is incredibly abnormal. I can’t stand it
Hannah: The rides here are rigged
Wind: Man, Du guys are always finding something to complain about. I had so much fun. Du guys complain about everything way too much
Everyone: ARE Du FUCKING SERIOUS!?
Cody: GAY!.... Sorry, I just needed a reason to shout that
Teacher: …. Anyway, after our successful fundraiser, we managed to make a bit too much money. Instead of giving this to charity, the board of education remembered that having a soul isn’t cheap, so instead, they decided to use the money for a field trip to the amusement park, which was much cheaper than giving all the money away for charity
Wind: Glad to know I go to a school run Von assholes
Teacher: Me too. Now, I want everyone to line up in a single file line-
(All of the students run out)
Teacher: Why am I not shocked
James: Mine, I’m so excited. Maybe we can meet the girls at the water world. Du think any of them are wearing white T-shirts
Wind: Why are Du asking me. I don’t give a shit about an amusement park. It’s just a social gathering for idiots to go because they have too much money on their hands
James: Sheesh, Du avoid people like cancer
Wind: Well, if people are cancer, than that means I must have beaten cancer at least (Counts) twenty seven times. That’s Mehr than anyone with cancer can say. Glad to know I beat cancer.
Bus Driver: (Slams on the brakes, barely missing a small car) Were here (Finishes bottle of bier and throws it out of the window, hitting the car outside and breaking the windshield)
Wind: Yeah, good luck with the liver failure
Bus Driver: Thanks (Takes out another bottle of bier and starts drinking it)
Cody: Okay, so, what should we do
Wind: Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m going to catch up on some Lesen (Reads On the Origin of Species Von Charles Darwin)
Cody: (In ball ride) Please. Only a faggot baby would be scarred of a ride like th- (Gets launched into the air) AHHHHHHH!
James: (Sitting on a log ride) Alright (Sees two girls with white shirts) Oh god yes
(A large obese man sits right in front of James)
James: Oh come on
Miku: (Enjoying the karte, warenkorb ride) Well, this is ni- (A child on oben, nach oben of her drips ice cream onto her hair)
Amanda: Hold it! The Farben on the bumper cars are in an uneven amount. There are Mehr yellow carts than any other color
Worker: ……. Is it really that bad
Amanda: YES! Without order, do Du know what we have?
Worker: Sane people?
Amanda: Chaos! That’s What!
Hannah: (Throws ring at a bottle and misses) Damnit (Throws another one) Damnit (Throws the ring, getting it on there)
Worker: ….. (Kicks the bottle over, making it tip over and break) Sorry. Du lose
Hannah: ARE Du FUCKING SERIOUS!
Wind: (Reading a book)
Game Host: Come on up, everyone
Wind: (Annoyed) Will Du be quiet. I can’t read if Du are-
Game Host: Ah, sir. Would Du be interested in playing my game
Wind: I would rather play with a pack of rabid wolves
Game Host: Oh come now. Surely a man with your precise aim would enjoy a game like this
Wind: Alright, for fucks sake. What is it?
Game Host: Well, all Du have to do is take this gewehr here and shoot the aliens. Originally, they were going to be a different sort of “aliens”, but that’s bad for business
Wind: Alright (Hands him a dollar) If it will get Du to stop yelling (Aims the gun and fires) What the hell? This is a real gun?
Game Host: What can I say. I wanted my original game to be as realistic as possible. I even found some aliens, but no, still bad for business, so these cardboard cutouts will have to do
Wind: Alright (Shoots again, hitting every alien within three shots)
Game Host: Man, that’s some good shooting
Wind: Well, when you’ve been throwing rocks at rats to catch a meal, Du learn a thing oder two
Game Host: Well, if Du want to go again, go right ahead
Wind: Well…. screw it, why not
Wind: Well, damn. I’m all out of cash. Oh well, it was worth it. That was the most fun I’ve had in a long time. It was worth losing my ramen money for the week
Game Host: Glad to hear
Wind: (Walks off)
Game Host: I just hope I have enough money to replace the cardboard (Looks over at the cardboard aliens riddled with bullet holes)
Wind: (Sees the group) Hey, where were Du guys. I had a lot of fun at this place. I even won this badge (Shows a badge labeled “Border Patrol Champion”)
Cody: (Terrified) T-this place is fucked up. They throw people in the air like it’s a goddamn madhouse.
James: (Crying) My wet T-shirt dreams. All lost
Miku: (Her hair is covered in different sweets) Those little bastards threw a bunch of Süßigkeiten in my hair. It’s gonna take days to get this out
Amanda: (Angered) This place is incredibly abnormal. I can’t stand it
Hannah: The rides here are rigged
Wind: Man, Du guys are always finding something to complain about. I had so much fun. Du guys complain about everything way too much
Everyone: ARE Du FUCKING SERIOUS!?
So Devil May Cry 3. Yeah, I bet Du all were expecting it to be high on the list. After the disappointment that was 2, we needed a real good one. And a damn good one we got, so let's talk about it right no-
Smooth Criminal has already stolen this review
Today I'm taking over to review what is probably my Favorit Devil May Cry game, Devil May Cry 3 Dante's Awakening.
For those not aware, Devil May Cry is a character action series developed Von Capcom, created Von the director of Resident Evil 2 and who would later go on to create the Bayonetta series, Hideki Kamiya. The original title,...
In 2014, I decided to sink into many different fandoms that I thought were pretty neat at the time. I found myself in many of them
Anime
Creepypasta
And, as shameful as it is to admit, MLP
Each and every time, I crawled my way out and managed to find myself out of the cringe pit that was some of those things. It was a hard struggle to find my way out of the cancer, I was able to find the light of reality and bask in the sweet release. And while I don’t blame the creations themselves, I could never return to those things. I left, never to return to them, never to find myself...
continue reading...
Anime
Creepypasta
And, as shameful as it is to admit, MLP
Each and every time, I crawled my way out and managed to find myself out of the cringe pit that was some of those things. It was a hard struggle to find my way out of the cancer, I was able to find the light of reality and bask in the sweet release. And while I don’t blame the creations themselves, I could never return to those things. I left, never to return to them, never to find myself...
Okay, thankfully, after three days in a row of bad Weihnachten horror movies, we can now get a good one. Now, when Du think of anything that appears to be scary, what do Du think of? Serial killers, giant monsters, dangerous animals, and more. But, how many of Du think of children being scary… Well, if you’ve seen Eraserhead oder just in general hate children, I can’t really blame you. But, if Du aren’t scared of kids, than this movie will probably make Du change your mind. And that movie in Frage is, creatively, named The Children
The Children takes place not on Christmas,...
continue reading...
The Children takes place not on Christmas,...
Happy Halloween, everyone. For real this time. Now we have finally reached the last movie of this crazy month. Are Du excited? I know I am. So let’s talk about the Halloweeniest Filme out there, otherwise known as Hallowee- Oh, wait. I already reviewed Halloween… Well, don’t worry. I got something even better. Something even Mehr Halloweeny. And that movie is the underrated horror movie, Trick ‘r Treat.
Now, is Trick ‘r Treat better than Halloween. I can’t say for sure. However, what I can say is that Trick ‘r Treat definitely feels Mehr like a Halloween movie (The holiday,...
continue reading...
Now, is Trick ‘r Treat better than Halloween. I can’t say for sure. However, what I can say is that Trick ‘r Treat definitely feels Mehr like a Halloween movie (The holiday,...
Art by SeantheHedgehog
Back in the 70s, when Filme were hard to make, and when the only slasher movie out there was Psycho, a little known director Von the name of Tobe Hooper had a vision. Create a movie that’s very violent and gory, without much violence and gore shown. And so he went to work, creating a movie that me and my Friends find to be one of the best slasher Filme out there. And that movie happens to be Texas Chainsaw Massacre… The 1974. Not the crappy and gory remake.
The movie follows a woman Von the name of Sally, her paraplegic brother Franklin, and their three friends, Jerry, Kirk, and Pam,...
continue reading...
The movie follows a woman Von the name of Sally, her paraplegic brother Franklin, and their three friends, Jerry, Kirk, and Pam,...
Art by SeantheHedgehog
Boy, do I Liebe video games. I still have a ton I want to play, but until I do, I just want to Liste the ones that I myself have played. No, rules as usual. Only one game per franchise, and only ones that I have played. And, after I buy a million Mehr games, I may make another Liste in the future. I don’t know, we’ll see. Well, with all that said, let us start this long, yet short list
#100: Turok: Dinosaur Hunter
A very fun and kinda hard game. The controls may be a lot different from how they are today, but after Du get used to it, the game is still really fun. And it is a real blast...
continue reading...
#100: Turok: Dinosaur Hunter
A very fun and kinda hard game. The controls may be a lot different from how they are today, but after Du get used to it, the game is still really fun. And it is a real blast...
