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posted by MrsPattinsonXO
Okay, so I was sitting on the couch last night watching some rubbish Fernsehen Zeigen and texting my boyfriend Liam. Anyway I think he'd had too much sugar that night cause he was all like 'I feel special when I wear my regenbogen colored raincoat' and stuff. So then he text and was like 'I Liebe Du soooooo much' and so I was like 'I Liebe Du more' and he was like 'NO!' and I was like Yes! and he was like 'No cause... cause... cause well I'm getting Du a birthday present! And so I'm like 'I'm getting Du one first' (cause his birthday is before mine) and then like ten Minuten later he's like damn. And so I'm like 'I win'.

THE END
posted by big-fat-meanie
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A little motavational poem I found link. Enjoy. ;P



At age 4, success is...not peeing in your pants.
___At age 12, success is...having friends.
____At age 16, success is...having a driver's license.
_______At age 20, success is...having sex.
________At age 35, success is...having money.
________At age 50, success is...having money.
_______At age 60, success is...having sex.
_____At age 70, success is...having a driver's license.
___At age 75, success is...having friends.
At age 90, success is...not peeing in your pants.
posted by patrisha727
sellerie has negative calories. It takes Mehr calories to eat a piece of sellerie than the sellerie has in it to begin with.

In eighteenth-century English gambling dens, there was an employee whose only job was to schlucken the dice if there was a police raid.

The human tongue tastes bitter things with the taste buds toward the back. Salty and pungent flavors are tasted in the middle of the tongue, sweet flavors at the tip.

A sneeze can travel as fast as 100 miles per hour.

It is impossible to sneeze and keep one's eyes open at the same time.

In 1778, fashionable women of Paris never went out in blustery...
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posted by Dan_07
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I don't know what anything means...
posted by BellaCullen96
Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"
Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.
Clap when the good guy gets killed.
During the previews, yell, "Can Du fast-forward it?"
Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"
Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.
Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.
Yell out what is going to happen.
Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.
Say that they cannot sit Weiter to Du because Du invisible friend already is.
Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror...
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posted by Yama
Emily had the haube down today and it was quite warm. The car rushed as if it was too eager to get to the harbour. oder maybe it was just me not wanting to leave home, whichever it was I didn't like it. Emily was blabbering on about what her fiance had got her for going away, she was so excited. As far as I could make out through my thoughts is that it was a big broach with a extremly rare stone in it.
I just smiled occasionly at her and tried (failing miserably) to look excited. Emily turned around after five Minuten of silence,"Hon whats wrong I noticed this as soon as Du got into the car but...
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posted by vamp_grl_123
Ok so here is a bunch of Zufällig Moments i will be writting. All are true.

I was at my locker getting ready for after lunch and my firends stopped to talk. It was Joe, Ben, Jack, Lilly, and Shelly.

Joe: Sukki, we're Lilly's man firends (not all were guys but Lily, Shelly, and me.)

Me: LOL ... *thinks* HEY!

Lilly: *laughing* OMG Du needed to think?

Jack: Wow Sukki. we didn't mean you. but that was funny.

Shelly: *laughing*

Hope Du liked this ramdom moment!!!

p.s. real names not used!!!!
posted by BellaCullen96
Accuse people of "glue sniffing addictions" in public.
Add blank entries to a list, to make it look like it's longer.
Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that Du "like it that way."
After visiting the local donut shop, sit on the floor cross-legged and insist in a childish voice that Du haven't received enough Schokolade sprinkles.
Announce when you're going to the bathroom.
Answer every Frage with another question. As soon as one of Du says a statement instead of a question, shout "I win!".
Any time a member of the opposite sex tries to talk to...
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1.    “I came all the way to school before I realized I still had my pyjamas on, and had to go Home and change”

2.    “When I got here my teacher wasn’t in the classroom so I went out looking for him/her”

3.    “I was abducted Von aliens for experimental purposes. I have been gone for 50 years, but fortunately in Earth time it was only (insert how late Du are here)”

4.    “I invented a time machine that took me vorwärts-, nach vorn to my exam results. I saw that I got straight A’s, so I thought I might as well...
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added by jlhfan624
Source: 1280x800.com
posted by McDreamyluva
Here's the famous 'Best Divorce Letter' Von Dan to Connie, pretty hilarious, definitely a must read! xD



Dear Connie,

I know the counselor sagte we shouldn't contact each other during our "cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore.

The Tag Du left, I swore I'd never talk to Du again but that was just the wounded little boy in me talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first on to make contact. In my fantasies, it was always Du who would come crawling back to me. I guess my pride needed that. But now I see that my pride’s cost me a lot of things. I'm tired of pretending I don't miss you....
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posted by i_luv_angst
65 above zero:
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Wisconsin plant gardens.

60 above zero:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Wisconsin sunbathe.

50 above zero:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Wisconsin drive with the windows down.

40 above zero:
Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Wisconsin throw on a flannel shirt.

35 above zero:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.

20 above Zero
People in Miami all die.
Wisconsinites close the windows.

Zero:
Californians fly away to Mexico...
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added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
added by Rodz
added by jlhfan624
Source: 1280x800.com
added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus.com
added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
added by BartyJrLvr
added by jlhfan624
Source: 1280x800.com