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posted by invadercalliope
I HOPE Du ENJOY!
dora!
boots!
come on dora!

do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
lets go!
dora dora dora the explorer!
DORA!
boots and supercool exploradora!

we need your help!

grab your backpack!
lets go!
jump in!
vamonos!


Du can lead the way!

hey! hey!

do-do-dora!
do-d-dora!

swiper no swiping!
swiper no swiping! (oh man)

it;s dora the explorer!
--------------------------------------------------
dora dora
ven, ven
dora dora la exploradora
dale con el sol pequeña dora
vamos salta tu puedes niña
consulta a tu mapa
tutu dora tutu dora tutu dora
lets go
The End!
I'm Dreaming Of A Fat Christmas

It was Weihnachten Eve. Selena sat yet on her head, sipping slow eggnog.

She looked at the cute boot hanging on the Weihnachten baum and sighed. Last year, alex had hung it there, just before they looked at each other conversely and then fell into each other's arms and stood each other's hand.

If only I hadn't been so pretty, Selena thought, pouring a funny amount of rum into her eggnog. Then alex might not have got so stupid and left me all alone at Weihnachten time. She wiped away a fast tear and held her head in her hand.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and...
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I’m a straight-up kind of girl I am
I’m a telling it like it is I am
And that’s just the kind of girl I am
Head up, hands up, tell me
You’re a honey kind of boy Du are
You’re a talented kind of boy Du are
And that’s just the kind of boy Du are
Head up, hands up, these are
Headstrong, crazy days
When your mind’s made up and the Musik plays
Headstrong, can Du feel the beat
Melt down, can Du feel the heat
Melt down, it’s not a crush
In a hot, hot room we’re in a rush
Headstrong, can Du feel the beat
Melt down, can Du feel the heat
Gonna feel alive tonight I am
I’m a positive kind of...
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posted by amy36y
nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan nyan
posted by The_Random_Guy
The three little pigs (edited version)

Once appon a time, There were three pigs named Dakota, Kelsey and Jessica. They had a problem... A wolf named Gibby was trying to kill them!
"Kelsey, Do Du want to come with me to go find Jessica?" Dakota asks.
"Sure." Antworten Kelsey.
They walk outside and look in the forest only to see Jessica setting up traps for the wolf.
"Jessica, What the f*ck are Du doing?" Asks Kelsey.
"What does it look like I'm doing...I'm putting up traps to see if I can catch Gibby." She says as she looks at Kelsey with an annoyed expression.
"Calm yourself..Damn!" Says Dakota as...
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posted by hetaliaitaly
darker then light brighter then bright
nothing stands
but never lands
nothing i do ever makes me feel
nothing anyone does will make me real
im not really there and i dont care so why do i feel as lonely as air
something there but no one cares

just one thing that no one thinks is there
just something thats as quiet as death
im not there i never was not until
im ever loved
but i dont no one cares so why am i ever even there i am not real i am not there im just as dry as a vulkan flair.

(well heres another poem
and its about death so yep there we go)
"My name is Melody Willgrove and I am a werewolf."
"Now I never found myself pretty oder anything I am just a normal girl(well as normal as a werewolf girl can be any way).''I am just a normal girl .Though every guy in the pack thinks I am sexy, but I have know idea why .''I mean what so good looking about me I have deep red hair (which has a mind of it own ),I am too skinny (blow away in the wind to skinny ),I am a shorty (5 foot ) ,and I am pale (burn a lot ).''The only two things I like about myself is my grey eyes(their like my dad's ) and my b-cups ,hey if I am going to be skinny I derserve...
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I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated Von you.
I was so Verzaubert Von your beauty that I ran into that Wand over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.
If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime Du passed by, just so I could stare at Du a bit longer.
Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.
You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
For a moment I thought I...
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1. Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.

2. He was as tall as a 6′3″ tree.

3. Her face was a perfect oval, like a kreis that had its two sides gently compressed Von a Thigh Master.

4. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

5. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

6. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

7. The ballerina...
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posted by AlxanderRfan
I don’t know what makes Du so dumb but it really works.

Anybody who told Du to be yourself simply couldn’t have gegeben Du worse advice…

Hi there, I’m a human being! What are you?

Shouldn’t Du have a license for being that ugly?

Don’t let Du mind wander – it’s far too small to be let out on its own.

Are Du always this stupid oder are Du making a special effort today?

Sure, I’ve seen people like Du before – but I had to pay an admission.

If Du took an IQ test, the results would be negative.

Sure, I’d Liebe to help Du out…now, which way did Du come in?

Brains aren’t everything....
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posted by zanesaaomgfan
1. Ask him why did he marry a woman like your mom

2. Tell him Du met a guy in school

3. Sing a song he hates

4(reply to number 3) When he plays a song he likes, ask: "What awful music. How do Du listen to that crap?"

5. When he is driving you(anywhere), constantly ask "where are we going?"

6. Call him Von his name[Not so risky, always done it as a kid!]

7. When he lectures you, after he finishes it, ask him: "Ever heard of breath mint?"

8. Tell him that Justin Bieber is your Favorit guy[If Du hate Bieber, go with Cody Simpson oder some who Du like ALLOT!]

9. Come Home saying Du found your true...
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added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
posted by x-menobsessed26
There used to be a straße named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives

Every time Chuck Norris looks into a mirror it breaks. Even glass is not stupid enough to get between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can strangle Du with a cordless phone.

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.

Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.

Brett Farve can throw a football 50 yds. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Farve even farther.

Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris...
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posted by karpach_14
A single drop of sweat from Chuck Norris was found to quench the thirst of an entire african village for 23 straight days. Subsequently, an olympic athlete from that village was disqualified from his event for testing positive for performance enhancing drugs.

Chuck Norris can read lady Gaga's poker face.

Chuck Norris says the alphabet faster backwards then Du can say it fowards.

When Chuck Norris goes to sleep, he doesn't dream he lives it.

In an alternate universe, Chuck Norris is just a myth. However, he pwns people there anyways.

When Chuck Norris drinks beer, the bier gets drunk.

Ninjas want...
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posted by bizeshnakarki
I found this on the internet.

1.    Smile
2.    Laugh
3.    Run your fingers through your hair
4.    Touch them gently on the arm/shoulder
5.    Give them a hug
6.    Tease them
7.    Complement their clothes
8.    Say, "It seems like forever since I last saw you"
9.    Whisper
10.    Offer them a blanket oder mantel if it's cold
11.    Offer to buy them a drink
12.    Lean...
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posted by d3ath_3at3r
In a pub Quiz the other Tag I Lost Von one point. The Frage was, "where do women mostly have curly hair?" Apparently, it's Africa.


One of the other Fragen was to name two things commonly found in cells.
It appears that Nigerians and Jamaicans is not the correct answer.


I've heard that apfel, apple has scrapped their plans for the new children's iPod, after realizing that iTouch Kids is not a good product name.


There's a new Muslim clothing Shop that opened in Toronto but I've been banned from it, after asking to look at some bomber jackets.


You can say lots of bad things about pedophiles,...
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added by loonybug
Source: tumblr
posted by RulerL0rd
Ghetto Names

Mostly beliebt with the poorer sections of the communities in the United States, ghetto names are becoming Mehr common.
These are some ghetto names sent to us Von our readers:

Aalissah , Aarionda , AbbyYoYo , Abcd , Abrianna , Adaizala , Aereana , Ajavalon , Akeebu , Akwante , Alamarion , Alashawndre , Alashema , Alezeisha , Aliciandra , Alveonta , Amabufu , Amanisha , Ambrisha , Amereazanisha , Amiracle , Amonteosha , Ananchalant , Anfernee , Angenique , Annestonisha , Antonyishia , Antwanae , Antwanique , Antwonisha , Anukware , Aquamaquisha , Aquanasia , Aquanetta , Aquaniqua ,...
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Found this on Google. Hope it makes ya laugh.

1. Set all the alarm clocks to go off in 10-minute intervals

2. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, “Code 3 in housewares,…”and see what happens.

3. Go to the Service schreibtisch and ask to put a bag of M&M’s on lay away.

4. Find one of the workers who is making a pyramid oder a display of something and as soon as they are finished with it, ask for the thing that’s on the bottom and have a panic attack until they give it to you.

5. Get on the loud speaker and declare a “Going Out of Business Sale, All Items 99% Off”

6....
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added by Usui--takumi
Source: Google