Things other's hate
Here's a few things Du can do to make everyone pissed off at you.
1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. If Du have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what Du think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc." them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophecy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over Von clamping your hands over your ears.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink patrone across the room.
14. Holler Zufällig numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the background color on your E-Mail so that all your E-Mail correspondence is in green, and insist to others that Du "like it that way."
16. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly Du can make a "croaking" noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints Von the cash register.
20. TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute entire streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times:
"Do Du hear that?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture Von tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce, "no, wait, I messed it up,"and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
Here's a few things Du can do to make everyone pissed off at you.
1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. If Du have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what Du think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc." them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophecy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over Von clamping your hands over your ears.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink patrone across the room.
14. Holler Zufällig numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the background color on your E-Mail so that all your E-Mail correspondence is in green, and insist to others that Du "like it that way."
16. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly Du can make a "croaking" noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints Von the cash register.
20. TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute entire streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times:
"Do Du hear that?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture Von tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce, "no, wait, I messed it up,"and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
