Hello, my name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of being kidnapped and executed Von anal electrocution, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me Von people who actually believe that if Du send them on, then that poor 6 Jahr old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to the traveling freak show. Do Du honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give Du and everyone Du send "his" E-Mail to $1000? How stupid are you?

Ooooh, lookyhere! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid Von every Playboy model in the magazine! What a bunch of bullshit.

So basically, this message is a big FUCK Du to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards. Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started Von Jesus in 5 A.D. and was brought to this country Von midget pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the Jahr 2000, it'll be in the guinneß, guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity.

Fuck them.

If you're going to vorwärts-, nach vorn something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't fucking care.

Zeigen a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to Von sending out forwards. Chances are it's your own unpopularity.

The point being? If Du get some chain letter that's threatening to leave Du shagless oder luckless for the rest of your life, Löschen it. If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off Von making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth, who's been tied to a dead elefant for 27 years, whose only savior is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if Du vorwärts-, nach vorn this mail, otherwise you'll end up like Miranda. Right? Now vorwärts-, nach vorn this to everyone Du know otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.