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18 Fun Things To Do In A Final That Does Not Matter (i.e. Du are going to fail the class completely no matter what Du get on the final exam)

1) Get the copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!"

2) Talk the entire way through the exam. Read Fragen aloud, Debatte your Antwort with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure Du can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3) Bring cheerleaders.

4) Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five Minuten into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"

5) On the answer sheet (book, whatever) find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this Frage on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.

6) Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.

7) Fifteen Minuten into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas!" If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say Du Lost the first one. Repeat this process every fifteen minutes.

8) Do the entire exam in another language. If Du don't know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.

9) Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, Bewegen to another seat, continue with the exam.

10) Turn in the eam approximately 30 Minuten into it. As Du walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.

11) Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks Du why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"

12) Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag Du away.

13) Bring a water pistol with you. 'Nuff said.

14) From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for Du to stop. When they finally get Du to leave one way oder another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.

15) One word: Wrestlemania.

16) Try to get people in the room to do the wave.

17) Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc . . . sent to Du every few Minuten throughout the exam.

18) Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If Du are asked to stop, say "it helps me think." bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the secion on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase "Told Du so.".
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