37 Rude & Crude Pick-up Lines
1. I wish Du were a door so I could slam Du all day.
2. Nice legs...what time do they open?
3. Do Du work for UPS? I thought I saw Du checking out my package.
4. You've got 206 Bones in your body, want one more?
5. Can I buy Du a drink oder do Du just want the money?
6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted bett Thrasher: have Du seen one?
8. I'm fighting the urge to make Du the happiest woman on earth tonight.
9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and Du can blow the hell outta me.
10. I wish Du were a pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride Du all Tag long for a quarter.
11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
12. I'd really like to see how Du look when I'm naked.
13. Is that a ladder in your stockings oder the stairway to heaven?
14. Du might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
15. Are those real?
16. Du must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing Du do with your tongue.
18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be Du Von morning.
19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.
20. Du know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
22. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name sherry Titsbottom?
23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
25. Do Du believe in Liebe at first sight oder should I walk Von again?
26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone sagte Du were looking for me.
27. My friend wants to know if Du think I'M cute.
28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
29. My name isn't Elmo, but Du can tickle me anytime Du want to.
30. I know milch does a body good, but DAMN, how much have Du been drinking?
31. If Du were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't Du like pizza?
33. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go Home without me.
34. Do Du sleep on your stomach? Can I???
35. Do Du wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
36. I Lost my puppy. Can Du help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
37. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get Du out of these wet clothes.
1. I wish Du were a door so I could slam Du all day.
2. Nice legs...what time do they open?
3. Do Du work for UPS? I thought I saw Du checking out my package.
4. You've got 206 Bones in your body, want one more?
5. Can I buy Du a drink oder do Du just want the money?
6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted bett Thrasher: have Du seen one?
8. I'm fighting the urge to make Du the happiest woman on earth tonight.
9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and Du can blow the hell outta me.
10. I wish Du were a pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride Du all Tag long for a quarter.
11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
12. I'd really like to see how Du look when I'm naked.
13. Is that a ladder in your stockings oder the stairway to heaven?
14. Du might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
15. Are those real?
16. Du must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing Du do with your tongue.
18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be Du Von morning.
19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.
20. Du know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
22. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name sherry Titsbottom?
23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
25. Do Du believe in Liebe at first sight oder should I walk Von again?
26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone sagte Du were looking for me.
27. My friend wants to know if Du think I'M cute.
28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
29. My name isn't Elmo, but Du can tickle me anytime Du want to.
30. I know milch does a body good, but DAMN, how much have Du been drinking?
31. If Du were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't Du like pizza?
33. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go Home without me.
34. Do Du sleep on your stomach? Can I???
35. Do Du wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
36. I Lost my puppy. Can Du help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
37. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get Du out of these wet clothes.
BTW, this isn't mine. It was originally written Von XxEmolovexX. Copied word for word.
Dad comes Home drunk and mad.
He pulls out a gun.
And shoots his wife then turns the gun on himself.
The little girl sits behind the couch, crying.
The police came and took the little girl to an orphanage.
She walks into the bedroom, and there is a picture of Jesus on the cross.
Girl: How did that man get off that?
Teacher: He didn't
Girl: Yes he did!
Teacher: No he didn't
Girl: Yes he did! He always sat Weiter to me when my parents fought, and he told me everything would be okay.
Post this as 'Jesus story' (any place)?
Don't ignore this.
64 percent of Du won't re-post this.
Du never know who might be watching. Remember: the Bible says If Du deny Jesus in front of your friends, He will deny Du in front of his Father.
Dad comes Home drunk and mad.
He pulls out a gun.
And shoots his wife then turns the gun on himself.
The little girl sits behind the couch, crying.
The police came and took the little girl to an orphanage.
She walks into the bedroom, and there is a picture of Jesus on the cross.
Girl: How did that man get off that?
Teacher: He didn't
Girl: Yes he did!
Teacher: No he didn't
Girl: Yes he did! He always sat Weiter to me when my parents fought, and he told me everything would be okay.
Post this as 'Jesus story' (any place)?
Don't ignore this.
64 percent of Du won't re-post this.
Du never know who might be watching. Remember: the Bible says If Du deny Jesus in front of your friends, He will deny Du in front of his Father.
This world will fall under the hands of evil, darkness and shadows shall destroy this world.....the ultimate power of the darkness shall prevail. All of my enemies shall be destroyed Von this darkness...Only the worthy people will survive. All of the not worthy people shall be enslaved Von the twisted turns of the darkness. Tiere will be turned Mehr scarier...some humans will become frightful......and I shall have the ultimate power!, let feuer and ice come alive along with darkness.....dragons shall rise and inhabit this planet....The skies will turn black and red and the ground will turn to metal.......robot Einhörner will dance...the dance of....evil...Heavy Metal will come alive and there will be peace among every awesome human on this Earth....come and Mitmachen me as I take over this silly little planet....everyone will bow down to me and only me,.....I SHALL TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!!, mwhahahaha >:)
