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When you're happy and Du know it bomb Iraq
If Du cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
North Korea is too risky,
Bomb Iraq.

If Du never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If Du think Saddam's gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
(And he tried to kill your dad),
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think someone's dismissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.

If your corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain't easy,
And your manhood's getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.

It's 'pre-emptive non-aggression', bomb Iraq.
Let's prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq.
They've got weapons we can't see,
And that's good enough for me
'Cos it's all the proof I need
Bomb Iraq.

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We'll call it treason,
Let's make war not Liebe this season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq.


Last night I lay in my bett looking up at the stars,
the beautiful sky and the endless horizon
and suddenly I thought where the fuck is my roof?

To all medics: As from may 2001 viagra will only be available from the pharmacy under its chemical name. Please ask for ……….
Mycoxaflopin    

Humpty dumpty fucked a fat whore,
Humpty dumpty fell on the floor,
All the kings Pferde
and all the kings men bent the hündin over
and fucked her again

Sing a song of syphillis
a fanny fulla crabs
four and twenty blackheads twice as many scabs,
when the scabs pop open
the heads begin to sing
wasn't it a minging cunt to stick your penis in

It's not the length its not the size
its how many times Du can make it rise

Rosen are red Violets are blue
I have crabs and now so do you


(for Mobile phone)
Do u take me 2 b ur lawful wedded text m8,
2 have & 2 hold 4 dirty jokes & saucy quotes,
through poor reception & no signal,
until low battery do us part.

Last night i wanted Du
I needed Du so badly it hurt.
I wanted you
inside me to work your magic on me
but i couldn't find Du
………… stupid paracetamol

Sex is a sin,
sins are forbidden,
sins are forgiven
so get stuck in

I Liebe the way it rubs against my soft rosa flesh
and creates a foamy liquid
as it thrusts in and out up and down
I can't wait for the Weiter time
I Liebe my toothbrush

Twinkle, twinkle, massive knob.
Mary likes it in her gob
but when she feels that certaim twitch
she pulls it out the spiteful bitch.

Three blond MEN are stranded on one side of a wide river, and don't know how to get across.
The first man prays to God to make him smart enough to figure out how to kreuz the river, so God turns him into a brown-haired man and he swims across.
The Sekunde man prays to God to make him even smarter, so God turns him into a dark-haired man and he builds a boot and rows across.
Then the third man prays to God to make him the smartest of all, so God turns him into a woman and he walks across the bridge

(for a mobile phone)
You're so sexy, Du drive me insane.
Du fuck me so hard I'm always in pain.
Your sexy voice puts in slumber.
Oh fuck I'm sorry I've got the wrong number...

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
whos the fairest of them all?
The mirror laughed and gave a grunt,
Its not you, Du ugly cunt!
posted by slenderman777
About five years Vor I lived downtown in a major city in the US. I've always been a night person, so I would often find myself bored after my roommate, who was decidedly not a night person, went to sleep. To pass the time, I used to go for long walks and spend the time thinking.

I spent four years like that, walking alone at night, and never once had a reason to feel afraid. I always used to joke with my roommate that even the drug dealers in the city were polite. But all of that changed in just a few Minuten of one evening.

It was a Wednesday, somewhere between one and two in the morning, and...
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added by ShadowFan100
added by 3xZ
(From Shovel Knight)

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!! PROPELLER KNIGHT! V.S. KING KNIIIIIIIGHT!

BEGIN!

Propeller Knight: Bonjour, senior asshole, it's time to start!
Just don't start crying when I break your heart!
Your nothing Mehr than a wannabe king!
I'm a flying swordsman who can really sing!

I have a battleship, a girlfriend, and can soar through the skies!
Your just a 2 Jahr old who loves to eat pies!
Bring it on monsieur, just try to pierce these sexy eyes!
This rap battle will bring Du to your ultimate demise!

King Knight: Sorry I couldn't hear you, my swag was too loud!
I'm...
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posted by deathding
1. Play hide and seek!

2. Tell your boy/girlfriend how much Du Liebe them.

3. STREAKING! ^__^

4. Give everyone hugs!

5. Give the homeless all your money.

6. Take a shower! Don't want to be dirty before Du die.

7. Play the scariest horror game Du know.

8. Tell your Friends all your deepest secrets.

9. Grab everything at Target. :D

10. Do the cinnamon challenge. With cocaine. (You're going to die anyways.)

11. Mehr STREAKING! ^___^

12. Take a look back at your life's greatest moments.

13. Do that one thing you've always wanted to do. (In my case, skydiving.)

14. Play some Pac-Man. :P Just because.

15. Go...
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added by xwolf19
CELEBS WHO HAVE BEEN TURNED DOWN Von THEIR CRUSHES

Not even the One Direction lads get dates with all the people they like! Here's a Liste of celebs who have been turned down Von their crushes.

Emma Watson: “Between the ages of ten and twelve I had a really terrible crush on Tom Felton, to the extent that I would go into work in the morning and look down the numbers on the call sheet to see if he was going to be in. We Liebe a bad guy, he was a few years older and he had a skateboard — and that just did it really." She confessed her feelings, but Tom saw Emma in a “younger, sisterly way.”...
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posted by KissKissHannah
There is someone on deviantART. Not enclosing names because they may also have a Fanpop account. *shivers* My friend sagte he was a troll, but he's Mehr than a troll. He's a big BULLY. (The person I mean. Not my friend) He sagte I bragged about being straight (How insulting) and sagte my drawings were *insert a word that rhymes with hit here*. ;n; That was only because I occasionally drew on bases. He also sagte I was Mehr annoying than the annoying fangirls. Just because we have different opinions does NOT mean he has the right to bully me! I don't bully anyone who has different opinions! HE is the one that's Mehr annoying than the annoying fangirls! >:U
posted by ZacharyWhite
When some Zufällig girl added me on facebook... She was all like "Oh gosh you're so cute" and I was like "Yeah, sure whatever..." The again she was all like "Oh God I Liebe your style!!!" Then again I was like "Yeah.. sure.." Then she sagte "Oh gosshhh!!! It's like I can hear your voice talking in your message!!! You're an Emo right? I'm an Emo tooooo!! :-D Oh it's like we're SO MEAN'T TO BE!!!" Then I finally realize and sagte to myself "Shit I have a fangirl... okay, I'm doomed."

Girl: Hello? Du still there?
Me: No...
Girl: Oh you're soooo funnyy :3 We are so the same!!! Ugh! I wish I could just...
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I am the boy who never finished high school because I got called a fag everyday.
I am the girl who was kicked out of her Home because I confided in my mother I was a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because no one will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who held her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled night.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in a hospital because they would not let my partner of 27 years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away...
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added by Dreamtime
added by Gretulee
added by karlyluvsam
Source: tumbler
added by taytrain97
Source: Places
added by 8SymmaCutie8
added by Duncan-superfan
added by ladycountry
added by Tamar20
added by 3xZ
added by tanyya