Best of SATEN TWIST: (Heroic Hothead/Reformed drunk/AppleJack's husband)

AJ: (shortly after Küssen him on the lips) There's somethin' ah've been meaning ta tell ya.
Saten: *gasps* Oh god. Your breaking up with me.
AJ: What?
Saten: W Why would Du KISS me, and then break up with me.. That is so crue-
AJ: *puts her hooves on him softly* Honey. Relax. Ah'm not breaking up with ya,
Saten: (nervously) Oh.. Right, I I knew that.. (takes a large sip from the bier still on the lamp tabelle Weiter to we're their sitting)

AJ: (nuzzling Saten lovingly)
Saten: Huh.. That's so adorable, your like a cat. Only cuter.

Pinkie: (after battle) Umm.. Saten.
Saten: (sees a messer stabbed into him) stechpalme, holly shit, when did I get stabbed!?... That's fuckin AWESOME!!

AJ: Why did ya have a crush on me in the first place? There's so many others ya could of chosen... Why me?
Saten: Well. I always loved your voice.. And Du have the most beauitful eyes I've ever seen, ever.

Saten: (No! No! Don't give him the satisfaction of answering!) Not sure (NO! Du FUCKIN IDIOT! One of these days I'm gonna jump us off a cliff!!) shut up brain, oder I'll stab Du with a toothpick!

Derpy: (seeing zombies attack and realizes she needs to get Saten mad at the zombies, so he would kill them)  Um. Saten. Du know T dog from Walking Dead? 
Saten: Yeah.. He's my Favorit character.
Derpy: Well.. He died.
Saten: NOO!! 
Derpy: Got eaten Von zombies
Saten: (enraged) FUCK THOSE ZOMBIES (attacks) 

Saten: (to AppleBloom's new boyfriend) Lesson here.. I want Du to remember, that little girl was always like a daughter to me. So I don't want any funny business. Because Du make her cry, (shows fist) I make Du cry!

(Doctor Phil spoof) 
Phil McGraw: Okay.. So here's our Weiter guest. Saten Twist.
Saten: Yeah. I've been a bit off lately.
Phil: Yes. I looked at your files.. And I must say.. There are 13 signs, to a psychopath.. But Du have 29 of them.
Saten: (offended) Well. That's not very nic-
Phil: How dose your wife handle it? 
Saten: Can Du please leave AppleJack out of this.
Phil: Say? What's her number?
Saten: (gets up angrily) MotherFUCKER!
Phil: (nervous) ... Saten Twist everyone! (audience cheers) 
Saten: I HATE Du ALL!! (audience claps even MORE) 



Best of DITTO: (Reformed villain/Only known male alicorn/Luna's current boyfriend/respected leader)

Ditto: (Luna gave a ride to Ponyville with her stagecoach, but he's all dizzy) Ohh.. Warn me the Weiter time your gonna drive so crazy.

Ditto: We must stop them before they kill some one important.
Writer: Like Master Sword? 
Ditto: Someone important!
Writer: Saten Twist? 
Ditto: .......... Someone IMPORTANT! 
Writer: Scootaloo? 
Ditto: Yes. Exactly 

Luna: Say.. What happened to the escaping prisoner?
Ditto: Well.. I hit him with my car.
Luna: Du hit him!? 
Ditto: Yep.
Luna: Du ran over, a fellow pony!?
Ditto: Sure did,
Luna: But.. What about Celestia's rule!? 
Ditto: ... Didn't kill him.
(shows the prisoner in the hospital, everything but his head is bandaged up) 
Prisoner: (to nurse) Du wanna know. How I got these scars!? 
Nurse: (heard it before) Hmm,. From Ditto? 
Prisoner: From, Ditto!!

Celestia: Ditto, dear, we need your help again.
Ditto: (groans) fine... (sarcastically) someone better be dying! 
(skips ahead a bit) 
Sick pony: I'm dying!

Ditto: Very well... Where's my lead captain!? 
Shining Armor: (runs into view and gives salute) Here I am, sir. Yes, sir. Right, indeed. Here, indeed. Yes, I am, sir.
Ditto: Look. We have his possible locations. Let's hurry up and find him.. The sooner we do this. The sooner I can get back to seeing my new girlfriend... Witch just so happens to be Luna.
Master Sword: (Luna!?)
Shining Armor: Yes. I would bet a mais farthing on her missing Du sir. Yes I would sir. Yes, a mais farthing I bet, indeed, sir.
Ditto: .... What's wrong with you?
Shining Armor: Little wrong in the head, I am, from eating bad sausages. Yes, sir, bad sausages did I eat, indeed, sir. Yes, I did. Some bad sausages, ate I.



Best of MASTER SWORD: (Reformed Psychopath/Hiding from Mafia/Derpy's husband) 

Derpy: It's not ALWAYS about the woman Du know.
Sword: huh.
Derpy: What?
Sword: Nothing. Just, rethinking my whole... Entire life 

(sword playing golf on natural television) 
Sword: Alright., ball. Time to go home.. (misses and starts yelling at the ball) Du little son of a (bleep). Why couldnt Du just go HOME!? That is your HOME! Du too good for your HOME!? ANSWER MEEEE!!!!
Sword: (throws the flag in anger) SUCK MY GREEN arsch BALL!! (the flag knocks over one of the camera man's) 
Sword: (pacing and enraged) (bleep)ED WITH THE WRONG MOTHER(bleep)ER! (literary EVERY word is being bleeped out) 

Sword: and that. Derpy.. Is how I got my wallet back from those crazy, insane aliens.

Sword: (first hearing of Saten's crush on AJ from Derpy having told him).. I see... Excuse me Derpy, I gotta make a phone call... (off view) Hey Red Head! I heard Du have a crush on some cow girl! 
Saten: (stupidly from other side of phone) WHO IS THIS!? HOW Du GETTING THIS INFOMATION!? 

Sword: Derpy. If Du weren't getting me laid so much, I'd swear Du were out to get me.

Saten: (when Sword first started dating Derpy) I'm glad your making Derpy so happy.. But don't go trying nothing.
Sword: Too late.. We had sex.
Saten: ................... (angrily punches Sword in the face) 
Sword: (crys in agony) Still worth it!!

Derpy: Who are you!?
Pony: My name i- (gets shot dead)
Derpy: (angrily to Sword) Du SHOT HIM! 
Sword: (holding gun) duaa. That's what Pistolen are FOR!

Sword: If Du don't shut up! I'll rip off your fuckin legs and beat Du to death with them!!

Derpy: I can never help but imagine what kinda person Du would of became, if it weren't for me..
(vision)
Sword: (gang leader) Alright boys! Let's rob the bank! Give the money to the poor, then rob the poor AND SHOOT THE MONEY!! (he and the gang all cheer)

Derpy: What happened to the AlexMane guy? 
Sword: He's being handled Von oben, nach oben men.
Derpy: Who? 
Sword: oben, nach oben men.

Sword: When Du get to hell! Tell em Master Sword sent ya!!