Bella: *walking into Forks High School* Oh, look, that guy is kind of hot. His name's Edward? Oh well, who cares anyway? There's Mehr to life than hot guys. oder guys in general.
Bella: Oh, look, i'm really beliebt for some reason. Well, these people seem okay. I'll be a good friend, and not ignore people oder treat them like crap, and DEFINITELY not ditch them to hang out with my some guy.
Edward: I Liebe Du Bella. Hey, wanna go out with me?
Bella: Um, creepy much? *sigh* Fine, i'll go out with you.
Bella: Okay, you're nice and all, but I don't believe in Liebe at first sight.
*They date*
Edward: I Liebe Du Bella. Oh, and Von the way, I Liebe how Du smell, and I sneak into your bedroom at night and watch Du sleep.
Bella: Du WHAT? EWWW! Stalker much? I want a restraining order! DAD, can Du arrest Edward please?
Edward: And I sparkle too! *Goes out into the sun to demonstrate*
Bella: *Shields eyes from the glare* Ucch, that's pathetic! Call yourself a vampire, what a sissy! Good-bye sparkly stalker! GTFO, okay?
Edward: Nooooooo! I Liebe Du Bella.
Bella: STAY AWAY Du CREEP!
Edward: I can't LIVE without you! *Goes and commits suicide because of Bella's rejection*
Bella: Whatever. Later, loser. *Continues life, gaining a personality and going to college, NOT getting married at 18 oder becoming a teen mom oder anything like that. She eventually earns a degree and becomes a doctor oder a lawyer oder some sort of respectable profession, never giving Edward a Sekunde thought, except to get a restraining order against him*
