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posted by LocalArtistist
Do Du work at Subway? Because Du just gave me a footlong.
Hi, do Du want to have my children? [No] OK, can we just practice then?
There will only be 7 planets left after I destroy Uranus.
You're like my little toe, because I'm going to bang Du on every piece of furniture in my home.
I'm no weather man, but Du can expect Mehr than a few inches tonight.
Forget that! Playing doctor is for kids! Let's play gynecologist.
Hey babe, how about a pizza and a f**k? [No] What's wrong, don't Du like pizza?
Do Du work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw Du checking out my package.
Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore - my face should be among them.
Hey baby, I think Du just made my two Von four into a four Von eight.
I'll give Du a nickel if Du tickle my pickle.
Du are so selfish! You're going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.
What's the speed of sex? [what?] 68. Because at 69 Du have to turn around!
I'm an astronaut and my Weiter mission is to explore Uranus.
If I had AIDS, would Du have sex with me? [No] Well, I don't, so let's go.
Excuse me, but do Du give head to strangers? [No] Well then, allow me to introduce myself.
Miss, If you've Lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?
(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made Du come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.
Hold out two fingers and say: "Why should a woman masturbate with these two fingers?" (I don't know.) "'Cause they're mine sweetheart."
Let's go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.
Do Du wanna come to the Marines, oder would your rather have a Marine come into you?
There are 265 Bones in the human body. How would Du like one more?
Why don't Du come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?
Hey baby, as long as I have a face, you'll have a place to sit.
Do Du take Visa?
How do Du like your eggs? Poached, scrambled oder fertilized?
Du smell... We should go take a dusche together.
Would Du like a hotdog to go with those buns?
Are Du a virgin? [No] Prove it!
Du bring a whole new meaning to the word, "edible."
I don't know what Du think of me, but I hope it's X-rated.
I'm a writer, you're a writer, how about we get naked together and put some Poesie in motion?
"I have this magic watch that can actually talk to me. Seriously, it's saying something right now. It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?." [No.] "Oh wait, my watch is an Stunde fast!
I like your hair, your eyes, your smile... I like every bone in your body... Especially mine!
Lets play "Titanic." When I say "Iceburg!" Du do down.
Would Du like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.
This is a condom. If we put it on, we can have sex.
Do Du believe in free love? [No] Then how much do Du cost?
Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?
Hi, I'm gay. Do Du think Du can convert me?
If I'm a pain in your ass... We can just add Mehr lubricants.
[Walk into her chest] "If they weren't sooo large, it wouldn't have happened!"
What are Du doing tonight? Besides me, of course?
Will Du be my girlfrien? I left out the 'd' cause you'll get that later!
My name is Skittles... wanna taste my rainbow?
Are those pants on sale? Cause they're 100% off at my place!
I'm with the TSA and I need to perform a full body cavity search, for security reasons.
I only have 12 hours to live... please don't let me die a virgin.
I'm bigger and better than the Titantic - only 200 women went down on that vessel!
What is a nice girl like Du doing in a dirty mind like mine?
What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.
With my IQ and your body, we could make a race of superchildren and conquer the earth!
added by DeiJambastion
Source: Meh
added by lionkinglove3
Source: Deviant art
video
#1:
Vanilla Ice: So what’s it like?
Girl: What’s what like?
Ice: Du know, having.. Parents.. Brothers.. All that, stuff.. Y’know?
Jon (dressed as alien): I am simple asking a normal human question, out of, curiousity, and not for my, deta, HUMAAAAAN!!!

#2:
Jon (singing Whitney Houston): AND IIIIIIIIIIII (HOLY SHIT!!) WILL ALWAYS Liebe YOU, I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU’D DO THIS TO ME! GOD DAMMIT, HOW CAN Du DO THIS TO ME!!!

#3:
Ben: That's a fake. That's not my sister.
Jenny: Ben I know those people.
Jon: PROOFF!!!

#4:
Nito (gets disturbingly close to the girls)
Debbie: We're...
Macie: Just leaving:...
continue reading...
added by GDragon612
added by ShadowFan100
video
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Musik video
Musik
mick gordon
doom
main theme
2016
added by SilentForce
video
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spongebob
funny
epic
hilarious
added by ace2000
added by SilentForce
added by ace2000
posted by Seanthehedgehog


 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see. *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see.
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see. *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see.


Song: link

SeanTheHedgehog Presents

A star, sterne Wars Fan Fiction

Starring Louis Bodine as John Smith

Sean Bodine as Morris Schaffer

Emma Watson as Mary in

Where Eagles Dare

An Imperial Landing Craft was flying through a planet covered in snow, 18 inches thick.

Also starring Keith Wickham as Colonel Turner and Simon Greenall as Admiral Roland

And Rob Rackstraw as Colonel Kramer

The Landing Craft continued to fly as it was getting towards some mountains.

Tom Kane as General Rosemeyer
Jesse Neighbour...
continue reading...
posted by TheMagicLoki
There once was a man, a young man named Kurt,
And he dug on a hügel a deep trench in the dirt,
To prepare for the horsepocalypse that would come,
For he did not deny its existence like some.

No threat would be larger, and no danger higher
Than when Pferde attacked in great horse-balls of fire.
They'd roll down the mountains and fall from the sky,
And all those who had not been ready would die.
They'd crash into houses, whole buildings they'd tear,
And burn all the people, not one would they spare.
They'd crush all our armies, destroy what they please,
And decimate great world leaders with ease.
All people,...
continue reading...
added by ace2000
added by AvatarAang97
added by AvatarAang97
added by big-fat-meanie