"Matt, where else are we going to go?!" Mom asked him.
"I dunno!" he said. "But you're not staying here! We're over, Hannah." He went to the front door, and opened the door for us. I had always known he was a jerk, but I wasn't expecting this at all. The panic didn't really settle in, until we were on the sidewalk, with all our stuff, and nowhere to go.
"Where are we going to go?" Kirsten asked, her voice trembling.
"I... I don't know," Mom said. I wanted to schlagen, punsch her in the face.
"Well, think of something!" I shouted at her. Her eyes widened at my outburst. "I'm so fucking sick of Du just ditching us, and leaving all the responsibility on Paige! Just think of something!"
"Pai--- Uh, Shelby, I'm trying!" she said. "Now would Du just calm down?" I gritted my teeth together. "Paige, do Du still have some money?" she asked. Paige nodded. "Ok... Let me think...." She sat on the curb, while her five daughters waited for her to come to their rescue.
But I knew she wouldn't.
Like always, it was up to me oder Paige how we were going to get through this. But even I couldn't think of anything. I glanced at Paige, hoping she was going to come up with something, but not wanting to put her on the spot.
"Uh, I got it... I think," Mom said. I was surprised actually. I would've bet that Sage would've come up with something before Mom did. "My... My cousin, Blaire. She used to be my best friend. She'd help us."
"Do Du even know where she lives?" I asked. Mom has little to no contact with any other adult other than Matt, oder whoever her current boyfriend is at the time.
"Um, no. But I think I know her married last name. We can look it up in a phone book." We walked into the busier part of town, where all the stores were. It's about three miles. We walked into a diner, and took a seat. I was exhausted already; I had to walk fast to keep up with my bad leg.
"Hi, may I get Du anything?" the waitress asked. She raised an eyebrow at the many stuffed grocery bags we had with us, but sagte nothing about them.
"Uh, do Du have a phone book anywhere?" Mom asked. The waitress nodded over to the far end of the diner, where there was a pay phone and a phone book. Mom thanked the waitress, and then went and started flipping through the phone book.
"This isn't going to work," I said, keeping my head propped up with one hand.
"Would Du stop being such a pessimist?" Paige snapped. I frowned.
"I'm not a pessimist," I said, "I've just learned from experience that nothing ever goes well."
"Well girls, let's get going," Mom said, coming back. "I got her address."
"How far is it?" Kirsten asked.
"About seventeen miles," she replied. Silence.
"Told ya," I said, looking at Paige. She sighed, shaking her head.
***
"Mommy, I'm tired...!" Sage complained. We'd walked maybe about two and a half miles. Just fourteen and a half Mehr miles to go... My legs were aching terribly.
"Paige, can Du please hold Sage?" Mom asked. I gaped at her. She was unbelievable.
"Mom, I'm already carrying Auburn," Paige said. Mom sighed. "Fine. Shelby, Du carry Auburn. I'll carry Sage..." She handed me Auburn, who was exhausted. The walk was almost silent, except for Auburn whining a little bit. We walked mostly down a dusty road, the sun beating down on us. It got kühler when night time came, but that still wasn't a good thing. I was thankful we weren't close to town, but still. I didn't know what nights were like here.
"I guess we'll stop here for the night," Mom said. We had stopped in a small town, even smaller than ours. She sat on the curb of the street. I rolled my eyes, and handed Auburn to Kirsten, then went into a small alley, going through the garbage. "Ew, Shelby. What are Du doing?" I glared at her, but continued to look through a garbage bin.
I found a quilt, that wasn't in too bad condition. I waved off the dirt and crap, and laid it out in the alley, like a makeshift bed. I laid down, exhausted, and the others came to Mitmachen me. Mom sat near us.
It was kind of beautiful, lying there under the stars.
"I'm so sorry," Mom muttered in the middle of the night. I was the only one still awake, so she must be talking to me. I sat up and looked at her.
"Ok..." I said, not knowing what to say.
"This sucks, doesn't it," she sighed.
"Yes. Very." She sighed again.
"This is all my fault..."
"Yes it is," I said. I rolled over and closed my eyes.
That was probably the longest conversation I'd had with my mother in a long time.
The Weiter morning, we started walking at the crack of dawn. All our stomachs were growling, but we had left the town, and there were no places to get food. Mom was able to keep Auburn fed and well, but the rest of us weren't doing so well.
"Are we there yet?" Kirsten complained.
"Eight miles left Kristen," Mom said. Kirsten raised an eyebrow at her. I rolled my eyes. No comment... My leg was soon killing me, almost literally. The muscle was tight and strained, and my legs were sore enough already.
"Mommy, can Du carry me?" Sage asked.
"I'm tired, Sage," she whined. Sage looked at me. I shook my head. Not a chance. She looked at Paige.
"Sorry, kid," Paige said. Kirsten was already holding Auburn, so Sage didn't bother to ask her.
"Hey, I can see a town!" Kirsten sagte excitedly. She was right. In the near distance, there was a town. Food. Water. My mouth was so dry, and my throat felt like sandpaper each time I swallowed. I just wanted to eat, drink, and then sleep for the rest of my life.
"See? We're almost there," Mom panted. I couldn't help but feel a little satisfaction at her pain. She caused all this. She deserved it. Us, however, I didn't know what we did to deserve this.
There was a thud.
We turned around, and saw Sage collapsed in the dirt. I fell down Weiter to her, my bad leg stretched out straight to the side.
"Sage?" I said. I rolled her onto her back, and opened her eyelids. They were all white. I shook her. "Sage? Sage!"
"I dunno!" he said. "But you're not staying here! We're over, Hannah." He went to the front door, and opened the door for us. I had always known he was a jerk, but I wasn't expecting this at all. The panic didn't really settle in, until we were on the sidewalk, with all our stuff, and nowhere to go.
"Where are we going to go?" Kirsten asked, her voice trembling.
"I... I don't know," Mom said. I wanted to schlagen, punsch her in the face.
"Well, think of something!" I shouted at her. Her eyes widened at my outburst. "I'm so fucking sick of Du just ditching us, and leaving all the responsibility on Paige! Just think of something!"
"Pai--- Uh, Shelby, I'm trying!" she said. "Now would Du just calm down?" I gritted my teeth together. "Paige, do Du still have some money?" she asked. Paige nodded. "Ok... Let me think...." She sat on the curb, while her five daughters waited for her to come to their rescue.
But I knew she wouldn't.
Like always, it was up to me oder Paige how we were going to get through this. But even I couldn't think of anything. I glanced at Paige, hoping she was going to come up with something, but not wanting to put her on the spot.
"Uh, I got it... I think," Mom said. I was surprised actually. I would've bet that Sage would've come up with something before Mom did. "My... My cousin, Blaire. She used to be my best friend. She'd help us."
"Do Du even know where she lives?" I asked. Mom has little to no contact with any other adult other than Matt, oder whoever her current boyfriend is at the time.
"Um, no. But I think I know her married last name. We can look it up in a phone book." We walked into the busier part of town, where all the stores were. It's about three miles. We walked into a diner, and took a seat. I was exhausted already; I had to walk fast to keep up with my bad leg.
"Hi, may I get Du anything?" the waitress asked. She raised an eyebrow at the many stuffed grocery bags we had with us, but sagte nothing about them.
"Uh, do Du have a phone book anywhere?" Mom asked. The waitress nodded over to the far end of the diner, where there was a pay phone and a phone book. Mom thanked the waitress, and then went and started flipping through the phone book.
"This isn't going to work," I said, keeping my head propped up with one hand.
"Would Du stop being such a pessimist?" Paige snapped. I frowned.
"I'm not a pessimist," I said, "I've just learned from experience that nothing ever goes well."
"Well girls, let's get going," Mom said, coming back. "I got her address."
"How far is it?" Kirsten asked.
"About seventeen miles," she replied. Silence.
"Told ya," I said, looking at Paige. She sighed, shaking her head.
***
"Mommy, I'm tired...!" Sage complained. We'd walked maybe about two and a half miles. Just fourteen and a half Mehr miles to go... My legs were aching terribly.
"Paige, can Du please hold Sage?" Mom asked. I gaped at her. She was unbelievable.
"Mom, I'm already carrying Auburn," Paige said. Mom sighed. "Fine. Shelby, Du carry Auburn. I'll carry Sage..." She handed me Auburn, who was exhausted. The walk was almost silent, except for Auburn whining a little bit. We walked mostly down a dusty road, the sun beating down on us. It got kühler when night time came, but that still wasn't a good thing. I was thankful we weren't close to town, but still. I didn't know what nights were like here.
"I guess we'll stop here for the night," Mom said. We had stopped in a small town, even smaller than ours. She sat on the curb of the street. I rolled my eyes, and handed Auburn to Kirsten, then went into a small alley, going through the garbage. "Ew, Shelby. What are Du doing?" I glared at her, but continued to look through a garbage bin.
I found a quilt, that wasn't in too bad condition. I waved off the dirt and crap, and laid it out in the alley, like a makeshift bed. I laid down, exhausted, and the others came to Mitmachen me. Mom sat near us.
It was kind of beautiful, lying there under the stars.
"I'm so sorry," Mom muttered in the middle of the night. I was the only one still awake, so she must be talking to me. I sat up and looked at her.
"Ok..." I said, not knowing what to say.
"This sucks, doesn't it," she sighed.
"Yes. Very." She sighed again.
"This is all my fault..."
"Yes it is," I said. I rolled over and closed my eyes.
That was probably the longest conversation I'd had with my mother in a long time.
The Weiter morning, we started walking at the crack of dawn. All our stomachs were growling, but we had left the town, and there were no places to get food. Mom was able to keep Auburn fed and well, but the rest of us weren't doing so well.
"Are we there yet?" Kirsten complained.
"Eight miles left Kristen," Mom said. Kirsten raised an eyebrow at her. I rolled my eyes. No comment... My leg was soon killing me, almost literally. The muscle was tight and strained, and my legs were sore enough already.
"Mommy, can Du carry me?" Sage asked.
"I'm tired, Sage," she whined. Sage looked at me. I shook my head. Not a chance. She looked at Paige.
"Sorry, kid," Paige said. Kirsten was already holding Auburn, so Sage didn't bother to ask her.
"Hey, I can see a town!" Kirsten sagte excitedly. She was right. In the near distance, there was a town. Food. Water. My mouth was so dry, and my throat felt like sandpaper each time I swallowed. I just wanted to eat, drink, and then sleep for the rest of my life.
"See? We're almost there," Mom panted. I couldn't help but feel a little satisfaction at her pain. She caused all this. She deserved it. Us, however, I didn't know what we did to deserve this.
There was a thud.
We turned around, and saw Sage collapsed in the dirt. I fell down Weiter to her, my bad leg stretched out straight to the side.
"Sage?" I said. I rolled her onto her back, and opened her eyelids. They were all white. I shook her. "Sage? Sage!"