"Matthew tells me you're improving. Guess that brings us a step closer to being happy again, right?" Charlie stared at me with a hopeful expression, awaiting the answer he wanted to hear all along. Yes, Charlie. I'm finally moving on from the past because I Liebe you. I Liebe Du and I want to make this work. I'm changing who I am for you. Dr. Thomas' words, his advice, echoed in my head as I slowly paced back and forth, playing with my fingers nervously. "Jamie, what is it?" "Do Du think there's any point in staying married if the relationship isn't going to survive?" I blurted out the words before I could think to stop myself. "I mean, let's face it Charlie... Are we even strong enough to want to fight for this?" An irritated undertone just barely touched the question.
Charlie stood from the couch and stepped closer to me, once again towering over me - making me feel smaller than I should have felt. "I thought Du told me Du wanted to try," he whispered, masking the hurt as much as he could, but he wasn't fooling anyone. "I thought Du wanted to make this work." I shook my head in disagreement, crossing my arms over my chest. "No, Charlie. You wanted me to try." He stepped away from me, visibly struck Von my response. "Why are Du Schauspielen like this, Jamie?" "Because I'm trying to get through to you! Du keep Schauspielen as if nothing is wrong and that everything will get better! I'm tired, Charlie, really tired. I can't do it anymore... I won't."
Now the irritation was taking its toll on him as well. Without holding back any longer, Charlie released all the anger and frustration built up inside him for the past month. "Goddamnit, Jamie!" He slammed his hand on the coffee table, causing me to jump. "Why can't Du just get a hold on reality and face it! He's gone! Alexander is gone and he's not coming back!" My tone matched his in volume. "Stop saying that! Du don't know, I don't know! Nobody knows what will happen, but I'm willing to wait!" "Why?! Why are Du waiting for him when Du could be helping me out here?! It takes two people to have a healthy marriage, Jamie! Two!" "You're telling me I need to get a hold on reality? Fuck you! You're the one who can't see what's really going on! You're being greedy, Charlie! Du want what Du can't have!"
I kept pushing just to see how long it took for him to finally break - something we both needed. "I bring Du all the way up here thinking that maybe, just maybe, you'd see how much I would crawl to make Du want me again. I was wrong about you... about us. You're right, Jamie, there's no point. There's absolutely no point anymore. I just can't understand why Du waited all this time to tell me Du want out." I lowered my gaze to my feet, my toes sinking into the softness of the carpet. "Because it took me until now to realize how much I Liebe him." Charlie shook his head, disappointed with my fantasy. "Well, that's it then."
He grabbed his sunglasses and car keys, heading for the front door. "Where are Du go?" I didn't really care; I just didn't want to be left at his parents' house. He stopped and turned around to face me. "I'm going for a drive. Du can pack your things while I'm gone. I'll drive Du to the airport when I come back... I won't be long." As soon as he slammed the front door, I reached for the telephone and dialed Matthew's number.
Charlie stood from the couch and stepped closer to me, once again towering over me - making me feel smaller than I should have felt. "I thought Du told me Du wanted to try," he whispered, masking the hurt as much as he could, but he wasn't fooling anyone. "I thought Du wanted to make this work." I shook my head in disagreement, crossing my arms over my chest. "No, Charlie. You wanted me to try." He stepped away from me, visibly struck Von my response. "Why are Du Schauspielen like this, Jamie?" "Because I'm trying to get through to you! Du keep Schauspielen as if nothing is wrong and that everything will get better! I'm tired, Charlie, really tired. I can't do it anymore... I won't."
Now the irritation was taking its toll on him as well. Without holding back any longer, Charlie released all the anger and frustration built up inside him for the past month. "Goddamnit, Jamie!" He slammed his hand on the coffee table, causing me to jump. "Why can't Du just get a hold on reality and face it! He's gone! Alexander is gone and he's not coming back!" My tone matched his in volume. "Stop saying that! Du don't know, I don't know! Nobody knows what will happen, but I'm willing to wait!" "Why?! Why are Du waiting for him when Du could be helping me out here?! It takes two people to have a healthy marriage, Jamie! Two!" "You're telling me I need to get a hold on reality? Fuck you! You're the one who can't see what's really going on! You're being greedy, Charlie! Du want what Du can't have!"
I kept pushing just to see how long it took for him to finally break - something we both needed. "I bring Du all the way up here thinking that maybe, just maybe, you'd see how much I would crawl to make Du want me again. I was wrong about you... about us. You're right, Jamie, there's no point. There's absolutely no point anymore. I just can't understand why Du waited all this time to tell me Du want out." I lowered my gaze to my feet, my toes sinking into the softness of the carpet. "Because it took me until now to realize how much I Liebe him." Charlie shook his head, disappointed with my fantasy. "Well, that's it then."
He grabbed his sunglasses and car keys, heading for the front door. "Where are Du go?" I didn't really care; I just didn't want to be left at his parents' house. He stopped and turned around to face me. "I'm going for a drive. Du can pack your things while I'm gone. I'll drive Du to the airport when I come back... I won't be long." As soon as he slammed the front door, I reached for the telephone and dialed Matthew's number.
I don't believe you.
I really don't
After all these years
This is what Du give me?
Why did Du break up with me?
I don't understand.
Du were so close with me
And then that tech freak came by
And Du left me.
Du abandoned me.
Why did Du dump me?
Such a close friend of mine.
Laughing with me all these years
Crying with me.
Now, Du leave me.
Why?
I don't understand anything that happened.
Why can't happy things happen
In this world?
Why do things have to be so sad?
I can't accept that it happened.
Because I am still a close friend
Of yours
But I can't accept the facts.
I just can't.
I really don't
After all these years
This is what Du give me?
Why did Du break up with me?
I don't understand.
Du were so close with me
And then that tech freak came by
And Du left me.
Du abandoned me.
Why did Du dump me?
Such a close friend of mine.
Laughing with me all these years
Crying with me.
Now, Du leave me.
Why?
I don't understand anything that happened.
Why can't happy things happen
In this world?
Why do things have to be so sad?
I can't accept that it happened.
Because I am still a close friend
Of yours
But I can't accept the facts.
I just can't.
When Du hope,
Du expect and wish,
Du have a feeling for wanting,
Your desires to be filled,
Du don’t want them killed,
Hope makes Du stronger,
We live to hope,
Hope is what keeps us going,
Keep it sealed,
Let it be healed,
Like it’s your shield,
Sometimes it’s your battle field,
Keep hope close to Du in life,
Sometimes Du need to rethink twice,
For hope is unstable,
It comes and goes,
Hope is a special gift,
Not everyone knows,
If they do, they don’t bother to show,
Some of us want to lose hope,
Some of us want to regain hope,
Some think it’s a useless tool,
Yet they’re the ones blind,
Who won’t come to mind?
Du and I, we all need hope,
No matter how far we seem from it,
It will find us one day,
For hope will come to us,
Wish and desire Du herz out,
Keep in mind,
Don’t back away;
Du know what Du want,
Keep hoping till the END……
Du expect and wish,
Du have a feeling for wanting,
Your desires to be filled,
Du don’t want them killed,
Hope makes Du stronger,
We live to hope,
Hope is what keeps us going,
Keep it sealed,
Let it be healed,
Like it’s your shield,
Sometimes it’s your battle field,
Keep hope close to Du in life,
Sometimes Du need to rethink twice,
For hope is unstable,
It comes and goes,
Hope is a special gift,
Not everyone knows,
If they do, they don’t bother to show,
Some of us want to lose hope,
Some of us want to regain hope,
Some think it’s a useless tool,
Yet they’re the ones blind,
Who won’t come to mind?
Du and I, we all need hope,
No matter how far we seem from it,
It will find us one day,
For hope will come to us,
Wish and desire Du herz out,
Keep in mind,
Don’t back away;
Du know what Du want,
Keep hoping till the END……
Friends Are Forever,so I thought.
All those pictures that I bought,now torn apart along with my broken heart.
I miss those hugs and laughs we use to share,because now they act like they don't care.
Now all we do is fight.
I wish God would give us some light,give me a solution to solve all this tension.
Friends don't back stab you.
Friends don't talk behind your back oder be pissed off at Du when they feel like it.
Nobody seems to care anymore.
Now girls are turning into whores.
All I know is that now we are all Friends for never.
When we need to go back to being Friends FOREVER!
All those pictures that I bought,now torn apart along with my broken heart.
I miss those hugs and laughs we use to share,because now they act like they don't care.
Now all we do is fight.
I wish God would give us some light,give me a solution to solve all this tension.
Friends don't back stab you.
Friends don't talk behind your back oder be pissed off at Du when they feel like it.
Nobody seems to care anymore.
Now girls are turning into whores.
All I know is that now we are all Friends for never.
When we need to go back to being Friends FOREVER!