Another Top 10.....
Video Games! Whether Du like them oder not, Du have to admit there's a surprising amount of depth to them! They take Du to another world and make Du feel like a hero! An epic bad-ass who can conquer anything as long as s/he believes in him/herself!
oder they make us a monkey fighting balloons, that works too.
But sadly, not every game is good. And that's actually understandable! Nothing's perfect, and some games had excuses for being below average!
But there are some moments on this holy planet where hell rises from its grave..... They send us a god-awful disgrace against humanity that should be eradicated from the face of the Earth.....
Bit over-dramatic there. :P
Basic idea, games can be terrible, and today I'm covering the worst one's out there. And now, without further ado, let'sa go! ^___^
o-O
#10. Ghosts N Goblins.
Now, don't get me wrong, but in a way, THIS GAME IS AWESOME. There's only one problem........
THIS IS ONE OF THE HARDEST, CHEAPEST, AND MOST UNFAIR VIDEO GAMES EVER CREATED. SERIOUSLY, EVERYTHING IS AGAINST YOU!
THAT GHOST WANTS Du DEAD, THAT GOBLIN WANTS Du DEAD, THAT BAT WANTS Du DEAD, THAT BAG OF F**KING CHIPS WANTS Du DEAD.
And almost EVERY SINGLE entry on my oben, nach oben 10 Things I Hate In Video Games IS IN THIS GAME.
BAD CONTROLS, CHEAP ENEMY PLACEMENT, KNOCK BACK, BOTTOMLESS PITS, A F**KING TIME LIMIT, (A VERY short one at that,) AND HELL, THE ENTIRE GAME MIGHT AS WELL BE A QUICK-TIME EVENT!
Also, this is a game where enemies and projectiles are EVERYWHERE, and are WAY harder to dodge than Du could ever imagine.
Oh, and Du also die in 2 hits, only have a few lives, and there's no passwords oder save features.
And if ALL THAT wasn't bad enough, when Du first beat the game, it tells you, basically, Du HAVE TO BEAT THE ENTIRE DAMN GAME ALL OVER AGAIN ON A HARDER DIFFICULTY.
DO Du THINK THAT'S ENOUGH KONAMI?!?!?!?!?!?
But the saddest part? Like the god-awful Anime Variable Geo Neo, (DON'T LOOK THAT UP, I SWEAR TO GOD. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.) IT HAD SO POTENTIAL! In VGN's case, it had a VERY cool concept, and it had my Favorit Anime opening EVER! In this game's case, it had some unique ideas, a cool weapon system, a nice soundtrack, and would've been great!
That is, if they'd actually TRIED to make an at least REMOTELY fair game! But they didn't, and scammed so many quarters in the 80's it's-
ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS. :D
Er, I mean, not funny at all. (:D)
In conclusion, THIS IS THE CHEAPEST DAMN GAME EVER MADE! It's WAY too hard for its own good to be ANY fun and that honestly destroys the entire experience.
Hell, I got so mad playing the game I started to wish people went School Days on Konami's arsch and slaughtered them.
Moving on, ugh.
#9. E.T. The Extra Terrestrial.
Kommentare Section: OMG JARED Y-Y-YOU PUT THIS AT ONLY #9!? O-O
Alright, I have to say this. Like the AVGN stated, the game isn't as bad as we thought. Sure, it's monotonous, tedious, frustrating, and boring, but it's not.....
Audience: o-O
Me: That......
Audience: O-O O-O X__X :OOOO
Me: Ba-
Audience: *Slaughters me with an Atari 2600*
Me: Ow.... X_____X
Anyways, this game is still shit. The controls suck, the Musik is a pile of vomit, the F.B.I. Agents are annoying as hell, and the pits were TOTALLY not SO MOTHER F**KING ANNOYING YOU'D HAVE A Mehr FUN TIME DEVOURING THE DECAYED SHIT IN AN OCEAN FULL OF URINE AND SHARKS WHILE A HENTAI TENTACLE TRIES TO DROWN Du TO DEATH.
Alright, I apologize for that. o-O
Still though, the game is that terrible. But the worst part of the game? Well......
Imagine if Du were a kid in the late 1900's and Du bought this game WITHOUT the instructions.....
Yeah, not a very pleasant time.
Overall, although it's not as bad as people say it is, it's STILL shit. With glitches out the wazoo, annoying pits everywhere, and VERY little logic in this game, (Not to say no logic...) The game gets #9 on this list.
#8. Superman 64.
Alright, if Du wanted to know a game with no effort in it whatsoever, this is the game Du get.
RANT TIME.
This game is INFAMOUS for being one of the worst games ever made, and that still holds true to this day. Because fact is.....
The game sucks. Hard. Harder than a steel-reinforced barricade.
Honestly, I could go on forever on this, but the worst part of the game is DEFINITELY the controls.
DEAR LORD, THE CONTROLS.
How bad are they? Do Du really want to know?
Drink 50 gallons of wodka in a Minute and play any game at all.
That's the entire game.
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
DON'T PLAY THIS GAME. I LEARNED IT THE HARD WAY WHEN I BOUGHT IT Von ACCIDENT WHEN I WAS 11. THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST PAINFUL GAMES I'VE EVER PLAYED, THE CONTROLS SUCK SO MUCH!
And there's time limits too, very short ones! ^____^
...
.............
.....................
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And Superman, THE MOST FAMOUS SUPERHERO OF ALL TIME, is flying through hoops.......
Becau-SCREW THIS GAME AND SCREW MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!
#7. Hotel Mario & The Zelda CDI Games.
Gee, I bet Du didn't see this one coming! ;D
Seriously, this games are NOTORIOUS for being some of the most unfair, cheap, and badly designed games of all time.
First of all, and Von far the worst part of both games, the cutscenes.
How bad do they look? Well, take Robotnik from The Adventures Of Sonic The Hedgehog and have an 8 Jahr old draw him in Microsoft Paint.
You could make a million memes out of this picture alone.
And yes, THAT PICTURE IS ACTUALLY IN THE GAME. I SHIT Du NOT. And that's just the tip of the rage-inducing iceberg because IT GETS EVEN BETTER.
For one, the controls in both games are terrible, and ESPECIALLY in the Zelda games.
I swear to god when playing Zelda CDI every time I pushed a button it vomited all over my clean keyboard.
And it didn't help that the actual controllers themselves are set up so strangely and are so unresponsive you'd have an easier time trying to wake me up after I got bitten Von a kobra, cobra then trying to play with the actual CDI controllers.
How in the name of all that is holy do Du play with that?
In a nutshell, Mario CDI is just a game where Du stomp on enemies and hide from them indoors, BUT I SWEAR the hitboxes of those god-forsaken goombas and koopas are larger than the Eiffel Tower. Du could jump and get hit Von accident from the goomba above you, THE HITBOXES ARE THAT LARGE!
Also, again, the cutscenes are absolute shit. First time playing the game on a ROM file I thought this was a fan-made game made Von a Sekunde grader, and to this Tag I still think it was.
Oh, and the Zelda games are even worse.
For the sake of time, here's the Zelda games in a nutshell.
YOU'RE LINK! Du CAN Bewegen LEFT AND RIGHT, AND WHEN PRESSING DOWN, Du CAN MAKE HIM DO A ente WALK! ;D
Also there's terribly lit rooms, candles that last for a millisecond, cheap enemy placement out the ass, and a map so confusing and hard to use you'd have an easier time trying to T.K.O. Mike Tyson than to use the map.
Also these games pretty much invented memes. That's all that needs to be sagte about these shit stains of the gaming world.
#6. PAC-MAN!?
Alright, so Du have a hit arcade game, and Du want to make it on a console. What do Du do?
A. Take time and effort into trying to make the game as good as the arcade version, if not better.
B. Eat a Pop-Tart because why not?
C. FUCK EVERY SMART IDEA Du EVER HAD HARD RIGHT IN THE P**SY AND MAKE ONE OF THE WORST CONSOLE PORTS EVER MADE.
If Du picked C, then Du need to Frage your life decisions. Sadly though, that's what we're about to talk about.
Pac-Man on the Atari 2600. Dear lord, this game is insulting on so many levels. But I think this ENTIRE entry can be summed up with one picture.
Yeah, the game looks absolutely terrible. AND I AM INCLUDING Von ATARI 2600 STANDARDS!
The game also has a nasty little habit of bugging out every .0001 milliseconds. First time playing this I thought I was drunk, but sadly, I wasn't.
Enemies will go where they aren't even supposed to, the power pellets don't even work sometimes, but the worst part? Well, it's how DISAPPOINTING it was.
Imagine Du were a kid in the early 80's who loved Pac-Man, and wanted to play it at home! PEOPLE WERE SO HYPED! Like, Five Nights At Freddy's 2 oder Super Smash Bros 4 hyped.
Pac-Man was VERY beliebt and they realized making a console port was a smart idea! But all we got was this unpolished mess.
On a final note, if I ever made a oben, nach oben 10 buggiest games list, this would easily make the oben, nach oben 3. IT'S THAT BAD.
AND NO, THE GLITCHES AREN'T EVEN FUNNY! THE GAME WILL RANDOMLY GIVE Du A GAME OVER, IT'LL RANDOMLY CRASH, AND SOMETIMES THE GAME WILL STRAIGHT UP FLIP Du OFF AND MAKE LEVEL ONE AS HARD AS LEVEL 50!
IT'S UNFAIR, UNPOLISHED, AND WAS ONE OF THE BIGGEST DAMN DISAPPOINTMENTS IN VIDEO GAME HISTORY.
And I swear to god this game will give Du a seizure if Du playing it for too long. I'm not even kidding, the flashing sprites REALLY hurt your eyes, just watch this gameplay video of it, IT'S THAT BAD!
link
Moving on. To the oben, nach oben 5. *Sigh*
Let's fucking do this.
#5.
