From an E-Mail I got.

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until Du hear them speak.

2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

3. He, who laughs last, thinks slowest.

4. A Tag without sunshine is like, well, night.

5. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

6. Those who live Von the sword get shot Von those who don't.

7. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime Du have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

9. It is sagte that if Du line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

11. The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left behind Von those who got there first.

12. Give a man a fisch and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fisch and he will sit in a boot all Tag drinking beer.

13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

14. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in the dark.

15. When Du go into court, Du are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people, who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.