In case Du need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Myer hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping".
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Chips: Du could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap".
(And that would be how?)
On some Frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost".
(But, it's just a suggestion)
On Nanna's tiramisu Dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down".
(Well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks & Spencer brot Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating".
(And Du thought?...)
On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body".
(But wouldn't this save me Mehr time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car oder operate machinery after taking this medication".
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 Jahr olds with head colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness".
(And...I'm taking this because?)
On most brands of Weihnachten lights: "For indoor oder outdoor use only".
(As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese Essen processor: "Not to be used for the other use".
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Nobby's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts".
(Talk about a news flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts".
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this kleidungsstück does not enable Du to fly".
(No way...are Du serious?)
