this in time, get to an Oriental rug. Shag is good!
Determine quickly which guest hates cats. Sit on that lap during the
evening. He won't dare push Du off and will even call Du "nice kitty."
If Du can arrange to have cat Essen on your breath, so much the better.
For sitting on laps oder rubbing against hosen, hose legs, select Farben which
contrast with your own.
Always accompany guests to the bathroom. It is not necessary to do
anything. Just sit and stare.
Do not allow closed doors in any room. To get one open, stand on hind
legs and hammer with forepaws. Once the door is opened for you, it is not
necessary to use it. Du can change your mind. When Du have ordered an
outside door opened, stand half in and half out and think about several
things. This is particularly important during very cold weather oder
moskito season.
If one person is busy and the other is idle, sit with the busy one. For
book readers, get in close under the chin, unless Du can lie across the
book itself.
For ladies knitting, curl quietly into lap and pretend to doze. Then
reach out and slap knitting needles sharply. This is what she calls a
dropped stitch. She will try to distract you. Ignore it.
For people doing homework, sit on the paper being worked on. After being
removed for the Sekunde time, push anything movable off the tabelle --
pens,pencils, stamps -- one at a time.
Get enough sleep during the daytime so that Du are fresh for playing at
night between 2 & 4 a.m.
