How much longer will Flippy go? He knows it's going to happen; it's fucking inevitable. I will not officially end this fanfic until Flippy goes ballistic.
Starring: Flippy(going a house-record 7 hours right now without going all namesake), myself(hey, it worked in most of my other fanfics)
Featuring: Nutty, Cuddles
Appearances: Giggles, Handy
*Same location, but Flippy somehow got ahold of my phone number and invited me to his house. Being my Favorit character of the whole Liste of baum friends, I enthusiastically accepted. He warned me that death can come from anywhere here, so I should tread with caution. I told him, and I quote, "Listen buddy. I've been playing videogames for 12 years now. There's not much that I can't avoid." Flippy then warned me again, and this time, me quoting him, Du haven't been here. I am a bär with mental issues. If anything reminds me of war, I can't control myself an wind up killing everything in sight, including you. NOTHING IS AS IT SEEMS HERE." I chose to not heed that advice. I told him I'd be there in 20 minutes, so I packed my bags. Here is what followed.*
Me: Hmm... an unassuming forest of baum houses and OH MY GOD, DID THAT SKUNK JUST GET IMPALED Von A TURKEY BASTER?!
Petunia, who wasn't even supposed to be in this fanfic: I'm okay... for now.
Me: Du sure? That thing went right through your intestines.
Petunia: As long as no one-- No, Cuddles, not in front of our new resident!
Cuddles, who IS supposed to be in this fanfic: Hey, I know his type: he has killed so many videogame monsters that he relishes the sight of blood. So... let's give him his first full-view death.
*Cuddles takes the turkey baster out of Petunia, who then forces it through her skull. Before Cuddles puts it through her entire head, he takes some of Petunia's brain with it. He then throws it unknowingly at Lumpy, who also shouldn't be in the fanfic, and impaled his herz with the baster, killing him instantly. 2 dead, and both were not supposed to be here this time.*
Me: That was just plain fucked up.
Cuddles: That's how life is here. And cruel and unusual death.
Me: Yeah, yeah. Just point me to Flippy's house.
Cuddles: Actually, you're standing right in front of it. *laughs*
Me: Ha, ha, ha, Very fucking funy. Now go before I score MY first kill.
*Cuddles runs like a scared little kid*
*I knock on Flippy's door, slow and soft enough as not to scare him; he greets me in a friendly manner*
Flippy: Come in, honorary baum friend!
Me: I was an honorary baum friend when I saw Lumpy and petunie, petunia mercilessly killed and for Lumpy, I say he deserves it.
Flippy: Lumpy is fucking stupid, so I have to agree with that.
Me: Please don't kill me.
Flippy: Not unless I can't help it.
Me: Ooh, nice! Du have a copy of Dragon's Dogma as well?
Flippy: I needed SOMETHING to get my killing fix.
Me: Du picked the perfect game. Du will get enjoyment out of it as long as both the console and the disc still work.
Flippy: And how much time have Du played it for?
Me: 165 hours.
Flippy: Over how much time?
Me: Almost 3 weeks.
Flippy: Holy fucking fuck!
Me: Surprised?
Flippy: Uh... YEAH! For every Stunde Du played that game so far, Lumpy has killed a baum friend Von accident.
Me: I fail to see how this concerns me. Now, where are Du in your game?
Flippy: I, actually, am about to face the Dragon. Grigori, they call him.
Me: And what level are you?
Flippy: Me and my pawn are both level 39.
Me: If I were you, I would get 10 Mehr levels and enhance your gear.
Flippy: Actually... I killed a erpel, drake once and it dragonforged my daggers. Yeah, I'm playing a Strider.
Me: Nice.
Flippy: I met that same erpel, drake an in-game week later and after I killed it again, my BOW became dragonforged.
Me: Holy shit.
Flippy: And after the Dragon fight, my armor set will be dragonforged as well. I have the best armor Caxton sells at this point, all at least upgraded once.
Edvine: Then get to about level 45. After the dragon is dead switch to Assassin. Max it out, take the augment that boost your offensive capabilities dramatically while soloing the game, than fucking sacrifice your pawn to the Brine. Du will be set from there.
Flippy: Thanks. Hey, I never caught your name.
Me: The name of my Arisen is Edvine; Du may address me as such.
Flippy: Fair enough.
Edvine: My pawn's name is Rintoo should Du wish to rent him.
Flippy: Named after the Ni Hao, Kai-Lan character I assume?
Edvine: How the hell did Du know that?
Flippy: I caught an episode of the Zeigen while my console was performing an immense number of updates.
Edvine: ... ... ... Here. *gives Flippy my copy of Dungeon Siege 3*
Flippy: This is the 360 version. I have a shiny new PS3.
Edvine: I know, but I can't trade the damn thing in. The game defies logic and works, but there is a steadfast refusal on a game which the disc's life expectancy is less then a year.
Flippy: So... It's a keepsake from Du to me.
Edvine: Technically yes. Now, let me Zeigen Du how an expert gamer plays Dragon's Dogma.
*I Zeigen him all the advanced tactics he can pull off*
Flippy: My soldier's intuition is Mehr than enough, but thanks for the insight as well.
Edvine: Now, where'd Nutty go?
Flippy: He's in my bedroom; I'm gonna pul an all-nighter out here.
*in Flippy's bedroom, where Nutty is*
Nutty: Heya, Edvine. I overheard your little chat, so at least I know what your name is. Now, Du got any sweets for me oder what?
Edvine: Just your luck, friend. I brought a few Milky Way bars over here.
Nutty: Awesome. Now, I also have a copy of Dragon's Dogma at home. I usually have a bowl of Süßigkeiten bars within reach while I take time out of my Tag to kill lots of creatures. However, I'm only level 28, but somehow, I made it to Flippy's current quest. I usually avoid encounters...
Edvine: But how did Du get there at only 28th level?
Nutty: Your guess is as good as mine.
Flippy, in the distance: Hey, Handy! I'm going out on the patio to take a smoke break! Watch my character okay?
Handy: I'll likely be playing with my feet Du know.
Flippy: I couldn't give any less of a fuck! Don't kill me!
*I would continue further with this part, but I'm tired. I'll continue this later.*
Starring: Flippy(going a house-record 7 hours right now without going all namesake), myself(hey, it worked in most of my other fanfics)
Featuring: Nutty, Cuddles
Appearances: Giggles, Handy
*Same location, but Flippy somehow got ahold of my phone number and invited me to his house. Being my Favorit character of the whole Liste of baum friends, I enthusiastically accepted. He warned me that death can come from anywhere here, so I should tread with caution. I told him, and I quote, "Listen buddy. I've been playing videogames for 12 years now. There's not much that I can't avoid." Flippy then warned me again, and this time, me quoting him, Du haven't been here. I am a bär with mental issues. If anything reminds me of war, I can't control myself an wind up killing everything in sight, including you. NOTHING IS AS IT SEEMS HERE." I chose to not heed that advice. I told him I'd be there in 20 minutes, so I packed my bags. Here is what followed.*
Me: Hmm... an unassuming forest of baum houses and OH MY GOD, DID THAT SKUNK JUST GET IMPALED Von A TURKEY BASTER?!
Petunia, who wasn't even supposed to be in this fanfic: I'm okay... for now.
Me: Du sure? That thing went right through your intestines.
Petunia: As long as no one-- No, Cuddles, not in front of our new resident!
Cuddles, who IS supposed to be in this fanfic: Hey, I know his type: he has killed so many videogame monsters that he relishes the sight of blood. So... let's give him his first full-view death.
*Cuddles takes the turkey baster out of Petunia, who then forces it through her skull. Before Cuddles puts it through her entire head, he takes some of Petunia's brain with it. He then throws it unknowingly at Lumpy, who also shouldn't be in the fanfic, and impaled his herz with the baster, killing him instantly. 2 dead, and both were not supposed to be here this time.*
Me: That was just plain fucked up.
Cuddles: That's how life is here. And cruel and unusual death.
Me: Yeah, yeah. Just point me to Flippy's house.
Cuddles: Actually, you're standing right in front of it. *laughs*
Me: Ha, ha, ha, Very fucking funy. Now go before I score MY first kill.
*Cuddles runs like a scared little kid*
*I knock on Flippy's door, slow and soft enough as not to scare him; he greets me in a friendly manner*
Flippy: Come in, honorary baum friend!
Me: I was an honorary baum friend when I saw Lumpy and petunie, petunia mercilessly killed and for Lumpy, I say he deserves it.
Flippy: Lumpy is fucking stupid, so I have to agree with that.
Me: Please don't kill me.
Flippy: Not unless I can't help it.
Me: Ooh, nice! Du have a copy of Dragon's Dogma as well?
Flippy: I needed SOMETHING to get my killing fix.
Me: Du picked the perfect game. Du will get enjoyment out of it as long as both the console and the disc still work.
Flippy: And how much time have Du played it for?
Me: 165 hours.
Flippy: Over how much time?
Me: Almost 3 weeks.
Flippy: Holy fucking fuck!
Me: Surprised?
Flippy: Uh... YEAH! For every Stunde Du played that game so far, Lumpy has killed a baum friend Von accident.
Me: I fail to see how this concerns me. Now, where are Du in your game?
Flippy: I, actually, am about to face the Dragon. Grigori, they call him.
Me: And what level are you?
Flippy: Me and my pawn are both level 39.
Me: If I were you, I would get 10 Mehr levels and enhance your gear.
Flippy: Actually... I killed a erpel, drake once and it dragonforged my daggers. Yeah, I'm playing a Strider.
Me: Nice.
Flippy: I met that same erpel, drake an in-game week later and after I killed it again, my BOW became dragonforged.
Me: Holy shit.
Flippy: And after the Dragon fight, my armor set will be dragonforged as well. I have the best armor Caxton sells at this point, all at least upgraded once.
Edvine: Then get to about level 45. After the dragon is dead switch to Assassin. Max it out, take the augment that boost your offensive capabilities dramatically while soloing the game, than fucking sacrifice your pawn to the Brine. Du will be set from there.
Flippy: Thanks. Hey, I never caught your name.
Me: The name of my Arisen is Edvine; Du may address me as such.
Flippy: Fair enough.
Edvine: My pawn's name is Rintoo should Du wish to rent him.
Flippy: Named after the Ni Hao, Kai-Lan character I assume?
Edvine: How the hell did Du know that?
Flippy: I caught an episode of the Zeigen while my console was performing an immense number of updates.
Edvine: ... ... ... Here. *gives Flippy my copy of Dungeon Siege 3*
Flippy: This is the 360 version. I have a shiny new PS3.
Edvine: I know, but I can't trade the damn thing in. The game defies logic and works, but there is a steadfast refusal on a game which the disc's life expectancy is less then a year.
Flippy: So... It's a keepsake from Du to me.
Edvine: Technically yes. Now, let me Zeigen Du how an expert gamer plays Dragon's Dogma.
*I Zeigen him all the advanced tactics he can pull off*
Flippy: My soldier's intuition is Mehr than enough, but thanks for the insight as well.
Edvine: Now, where'd Nutty go?
Flippy: He's in my bedroom; I'm gonna pul an all-nighter out here.
*in Flippy's bedroom, where Nutty is*
Nutty: Heya, Edvine. I overheard your little chat, so at least I know what your name is. Now, Du got any sweets for me oder what?
Edvine: Just your luck, friend. I brought a few Milky Way bars over here.
Nutty: Awesome. Now, I also have a copy of Dragon's Dogma at home. I usually have a bowl of Süßigkeiten bars within reach while I take time out of my Tag to kill lots of creatures. However, I'm only level 28, but somehow, I made it to Flippy's current quest. I usually avoid encounters...
Edvine: But how did Du get there at only 28th level?
Nutty: Your guess is as good as mine.
Flippy, in the distance: Hey, Handy! I'm going out on the patio to take a smoke break! Watch my character okay?
Handy: I'll likely be playing with my feet Du know.
Flippy: I couldn't give any less of a fuck! Don't kill me!
*I would continue further with this part, but I'm tired. I'll continue this later.*
