"Saying oh yeah I remember, when Du really don't know."
"I hate it when your sitting in the cinema ready to watch the movie and the Weiter thing Du know BOOM. Human giraffe sits in front of you."
"If Du sext do Du get a phoner?"
"That awkward moment when Du see two twins fighting and one calls the other ugly."
"When I get the answer correct and the smart kid didn't and im feelin like a boss."
"That look Du give your friend when someone attractive walks in the room."
"Laughing sarcastically and then making a serious face."
"Lazy rule: Cant reach what I dropped, don't need it."
"Touching things that say 'DO NOT TOUCH' because your a fearless bastard."
"Alarm clock: Cause every morning should begin with a herz attack."
"Hi can I help you?" No I just waited in line for 15 Minuten to say hi."
"Right before I die im going to say. 'I left a million dollars in the......' "
Age 11: "I whip my hair back and forth" Age 40: I drive my kids back and forth."
age 81: "I rock my chair back and forth."
"When I fill out job applications I always write 911 for my emergency."
"I wouldn't have to manage my anger, if people could learn to manage there stupidity."
"The awkward moment when Du realize you've been Singen the wrong words to a song your whole life."
Teacher: "Why are Du talking during my lesson?"
Student: "Why are Du teaching during my conversation?"
"Making faces to a strangers baby when the parents aren't looking."
That awkward moment when an ugly person says "I need my beauty sleep." when they really need to hibernate
"Everything is funnier when your not allowed to laugh."
"half the time I agree with people so they'll shut the hell up."
"That awkward moment when Du are on a bike and get hit Von a car....A Parked car."
"That mini herz attack Du get when Du reach Into your pocket and don't feel your phone."
"I hate it when I meow at Katzen and they don't meow back."
"when Du were 5 sticking your tongue out was like giving someone the middle finger."
"If people could read my mind I would probably get punched in the face. A lot."
"When I have children im going to make them watch the movie 2012 and tell them I survived that."
"The moment you're laughing so hard and Du try to stop, but Du look at the person and laugh again."
"Im not lazy, im just motivated not to do anything."
"Lying in bett wondering if its worth it to get up and pee."
Saying to your friends, "If we get caught, heres the story...."
"If Du friend request me on Facebook and your Profil picture is a car, I will assume your a transformer."
"When someone in your class is getting yelled at Von a teacher and your trying so hard not to laugh."
"I have a bad habit of laughing at inappropriate moments."
"Be strong I." I whispered to my wifi signal
Parents:"Who are Du texting so late." Me: Jake from state farm."
When I lose "who cares its only a game"....When I win" HAHA IN YOUR FACE LOSER!"
"Im literally my own bestfriend. I have inside jokes with myself, and sometimes ill start laughing out loud at how funny I am."
"lets watch a scary movie!" *Hours later* "Dude walk me to the bathroom."
"Imagine having a teacher named alejandro & whenever he calls on Du Just be like: "don't call my name, don't call my name, Alejandro."
"Saying you'll wake up early in the morning to get something done, then in the morning, convincing yourself its not important."
Dear Parents,
jasmin was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named aladin. Snow white lived alone with 7 men. Pinnichio was a liar. Robinhood was a thief.
Tarzan Walked around with no clothes on
A stranger kissed sleeping beauty and she married him
Aschenputtel lied and snuck out at night to attend a party.
Du cant blame us. we were taught to rebel since a young age.
Silly phone that wasn't a "Missed" call. that was a "Looked & saw who it was & pressed ignore" call.
"Dear teachers, if Du sit me Weiter to my friend, ill whisper to her, if Du Bewegen me away, ill shout to her, its your choice.
"I hate it when your sitting in the cinema ready to watch the movie and the Weiter thing Du know BOOM. Human giraffe sits in front of you."
"If Du sext do Du get a phoner?"
"That awkward moment when Du see two twins fighting and one calls the other ugly."
"When I get the answer correct and the smart kid didn't and im feelin like a boss."
"That look Du give your friend when someone attractive walks in the room."
"Laughing sarcastically and then making a serious face."
"Lazy rule: Cant reach what I dropped, don't need it."
"Touching things that say 'DO NOT TOUCH' because your a fearless bastard."
"Alarm clock: Cause every morning should begin with a herz attack."
"Hi can I help you?" No I just waited in line for 15 Minuten to say hi."
"Right before I die im going to say. 'I left a million dollars in the......' "
Age 11: "I whip my hair back and forth" Age 40: I drive my kids back and forth."
age 81: "I rock my chair back and forth."
"When I fill out job applications I always write 911 for my emergency."
"I wouldn't have to manage my anger, if people could learn to manage there stupidity."
"The awkward moment when Du realize you've been Singen the wrong words to a song your whole life."
Teacher: "Why are Du talking during my lesson?"
Student: "Why are Du teaching during my conversation?"
"Making faces to a strangers baby when the parents aren't looking."
That awkward moment when an ugly person says "I need my beauty sleep." when they really need to hibernate
"Everything is funnier when your not allowed to laugh."
"half the time I agree with people so they'll shut the hell up."
"That awkward moment when Du are on a bike and get hit Von a car....A Parked car."
"That mini herz attack Du get when Du reach Into your pocket and don't feel your phone."
"I hate it when I meow at Katzen and they don't meow back."
"when Du were 5 sticking your tongue out was like giving someone the middle finger."
"If people could read my mind I would probably get punched in the face. A lot."
"When I have children im going to make them watch the movie 2012 and tell them I survived that."
"The moment you're laughing so hard and Du try to stop, but Du look at the person and laugh again."
"Im not lazy, im just motivated not to do anything."
"Lying in bett wondering if its worth it to get up and pee."
Saying to your friends, "If we get caught, heres the story...."
"If Du friend request me on Facebook and your Profil picture is a car, I will assume your a transformer."
"When someone in your class is getting yelled at Von a teacher and your trying so hard not to laugh."
"I have a bad habit of laughing at inappropriate moments."
"Be strong I." I whispered to my wifi signal
Parents:"Who are Du texting so late." Me: Jake from state farm."
When I lose "who cares its only a game"....When I win" HAHA IN YOUR FACE LOSER!"
"Im literally my own bestfriend. I have inside jokes with myself, and sometimes ill start laughing out loud at how funny I am."
"lets watch a scary movie!" *Hours later* "Dude walk me to the bathroom."
"Imagine having a teacher named alejandro & whenever he calls on Du Just be like: "don't call my name, don't call my name, Alejandro."
"Saying you'll wake up early in the morning to get something done, then in the morning, convincing yourself its not important."
Dear Parents,
jasmin was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named aladin. Snow white lived alone with 7 men. Pinnichio was a liar. Robinhood was a thief.
Tarzan Walked around with no clothes on
A stranger kissed sleeping beauty and she married him
Aschenputtel lied and snuck out at night to attend a party.
Du cant blame us. we were taught to rebel since a young age.
Silly phone that wasn't a "Missed" call. that was a "Looked & saw who it was & pressed ignore" call.
"Dear teachers, if Du sit me Weiter to my friend, ill whisper to her, if Du Bewegen me away, ill shout to her, its your choice.
