Navy CIS Club
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# Your computer malfunctions and you're looking around for McGee to fix it.
# The Fernsehen network shows a promo for a re-screen and Du can name episode Titel AND number.
# Du wander the convenience stores hoping to find Caff-Pow.
# Du have an overwhelming desire to head slap anyone who ticks Du off
# Du find yourself scanning bookstore shelves for a copy of "Deep Six"
# Du find yourself calling the office junior 'Probie'
# Du see everywhere someone who reminds Du of an Navy CIS character, Du could swear they were their double, when they're probably nothing like them!
# Du actually consider a spinne web tattoo on your neck
# Du begin building a boot in your basement just like the one Gibbs has
# Du super-glued your co-worker's fingers to his keyboard and then left the room
# Du look on the Internet for a Mighty maus stapler
# Du postpone needed surgery because Du might still be under when the Zeigen comes on
# Du ask a bunch of nuns if Du can bowl with them
# Du take to drinking strong black sugarless pop Von the gallon
# Du teeter on impossible stilettos
# Du confuse English expressions
# Du start talking to any dead creature
# Du talk to your PC, CD player, TV and all other forms of technology in your life
# Du hold conferences with your neighbours in the lift in your block of flats
# Du drive at breakneck speed ignoring traffic and traffic signs
# Du take to wearing a dog halsband, kragen with studs oder spikes instead of pearl necklaces
# Du dye your hair red
# You're convinced your life will be complete if only Du can obtain a farting hippo stuffed toy that Du can name Bart
# Du dye your hair black and wear it in pigtails
# Du become a Goth
# Du start wearing black lipstick
# Du have a penchant for long winded stories
# Your catchphrase becomes "D'ya think?" oder "On it boss!"
# Du write novels using your workmates as your Quelle of inspiration
# Du get into forensic science
# Your favourite hat is a bright orange beanie
# Du only notice young men who wear Italian designer label suits/footwear oder silver-haired blue-eyed men who buy their clothes from Sears
# Du start referring to water kühler gossip as 'scuttlebutt'
# Du refer to the loo/restroom as the 'head' -- and Du were never in the Navy
# Du talk about 'zulu time'
# Du 'profile' any potential friend/boyfriend/girlfriend/customer/neighbour
# Du insist that the Sekunde B in your name stands for 'B******' - even if your name doesn't have a B in it!
# Du can eat cold pizza without your stomach churning
# Du can go on a frat holiday to Panama Beach
# Du have frat brothers even if Du haven't the foggiest what that is
# Du start threatening people that bug Du that you'll kill them 18 different ways with a paper clip, if they don't shut up.
# Take to calling men 'skirt chasers'
# Seriously look into getting color-contacts and try to copy the exact tint of Gibbs' eyes. [or which ever character floats your boat.]
# Du give up sunbathing to get that alabaster coloured skin
# Du sleep with a gun under your pillow
# Du give your lover honey dust
# Du take a liking to the smell of sawdust
# Du have problems using chopsticks when eating Chinese take-away
# The idea of building a boot in your basement, even though Du will have no way to get it out of the basement when completed without demolishing several walls, seems like a sane, rational, intelligent thing to do.
# Drinking bourbon neat becomes your favourite tipple
# Du give up watching the 6 Nations Cup (rugby) to watch baseball
# Get your partner to wear comfortable loafers instead of Doc Martens
# Du start addressing people, particularly men, Von their surname, dropping the 'mister' entirely.
# Du connect with kids when before you'd have run a mile
# Du become versed in ballistics
# Du become fascinated Von military acronyms
# Du begin calling your boss "Director"
# Du call wild drivers "Zivas"
# Du discover Du can instill fear in people simply Von glaring at them
# When a friend asks for support Du say 'on your six'
# Du think the FBI is inefficient
# Du consider Du and your lover having a quickie at the local morgue
# Du begin to wonder what sex in an armoured personnel carrier would be like.
# Du suddenly like men dressed in Gunnery Sergeant uniforms with oder without the cover (cap/hat)
# Du want your kids/lover/partner to carry a GPS chip about their person so they can be located at any time
# Du become a bomb disposal expert
# Du consider renaming your children/grandchildren Jethro and Abby
# Du spend most of your time reading/writing Navy CIS Fiction on Fan Fiction.Net. (guilty!)
# Du buy DVD copies of Filme that have Navy CIS cast members in, even though they are Filme Du wouldn't normally watch. (guilty!)
# Du spend another large amount of your time Lesen Navy CIS Fiction on Fan Fiction.Net and NCISArchive.Net
# Du get DVD copies of shows with Navy CIS cast members even if Du don't like the shows
# Du rout Du Tube for interviews/snippets of sagte cast
# You're favourite car is a sedan
# Du have several duplicate mobiles/cellphones in case Du break one
# Du have a new respect for the Israeli Army--especially the female members
# Du call the outsourced staff at your office 'liaison' workers
# And if your big boss is female Du address her as Madam, Director, oder Ma'am
# Du refer to a stethoscope as a 'Rubber Ducky'
# The randy smart-aleck male in your office is nicknamed DiNozzo
# Du start calling your husband/significant other My little hairy butt.
# Du ask your husband/significant other to call Du Sweetcheeks instead of honey oder babe.
# Du head slap everyone close to Du who says/does something annoying.
# Du start Schauspielen out your fav scenes in your fav episodes
# Du call your friends/family Navy CIS characters
# Any long winded speaker oder who frequently goes off at a tangent is affectionately called a Ducky
# Du begin to use "Elf Lord" as a pet name for your significant other (I don't currently have one, but I can assure Du it's my new Favorit pet name)
# Du want to buy an old fashioned typewriter, regardless of whether oder not Du actually write
# Du hope to take up knife-throwing in the near future
# Du look for "Lo Ball" CDs in every electronics section Du visit and online stores like Amazon.com (guilty!)
# Du don't mind starting work at 7 in the morning (I'm usually in the office at 0630... what does that make me?)
# Having your weekend datum interrupted to do some urgent work
# Du Kommentar 'nice cover' to an elderly gentleman wearing an Navy CIS hat. He proceeds to inform Du that it is not merely a prop, but one he received from his daughter who is an Navy CIS agent! Du are thoroughly impressed and want to ask if she has another. (Thanks for letting us play in the TV version of your world, NCIS. Stay safe.)
# Du go to work with a cold and when co-workers suggest that Du see a doctor Du look for Ducky.
# Du start looking for DiNozzo, Kate, Gibbs and Col. Mann when Du see service members in uniform. (And DiNozzo among the Village People!)
# Du hit the Internet/library to find out what poison ivy looks like because Du don't want to end up like poor McGee. (You also find the proportions for the baking soda/vinegar paste, and/or keep a bottle of calamine lotion with Du at all times, just in case.)
# Your reason for never getting a cold is because no virus/germ/bug would dare to even get near Du - 'cos if Gibbs can get away with it, so can you
# Du try to imitate Gibbs' glare when people don't do what Du want when Du want in the way Du want.
# Du get really excited when Du find out Du grew up in the same town Mark Harmon's father was from!
# Every time Du see a Dodge Charger, Du look inside expecting to see Gibbs, Tony, McGee, and Ziva in the car.
# Du get a mini and drive Ziva-style (like a maniac)
# Du hunt perfume counters looking for one that smells like gunpowder oder bourbon (even though Du know Abby made them... Du still hope to get lucky).
# Du hunt for a cologne that smells like sawdust to give to your man (and Du wish Abby was around to create one for you).
# Du get up before human hours to get a promo DVD and then watch the one episode all day
# Du watch an old promo video for hours because there is a couple of Sekunden of Navy CIS in the 'all the shows' ad promo.
# The only prospective boyfriends you're interested in have silver hair and blue eyes who drink coffee like there was no tomorrow.
# Du realise mustang is not only a kind of horse but also a kind of car (you're doing extremely well when Du know it's a Ford)
# Your mobile ring tone is the Navy CIS theme tune
# Your PC oder cellphone (mobile) Hintergrund is one of the cast/whole cast
# Your PC screen saver has Navy CIS scenes
# When Du say something rocks, you're not exactly talking about Musik :-))
# Du realise not all geeks are nerds
# Du start blabbering on like Abby
# Du talk geek-speak, not English
# Friends/co-workers ask Du to translate geek-speak
# Du are suddenly bad at computers and all technology
# Du are suddenly good at computers and all technology
# Du decide to do computer classes to be Mehr like McGee and Abby
# Du call technology doo-dah's
# Du find yourself getting angrier Mehr easily
# Du get shy and stutter more
# Du want to be able to do everything that the cast can do (never mind the fact that they have stunt doubles!)
# Du are considering taking art classes so Du can sketch Tony {or whichever character} when they come on the screen.
# Du believe Du know everything there is to know about the Navy.
# Du ramble off a bit of computer terms, having no clue what they mean.
# Du Suchen high and low for a paint gun so Du can shoot your favourite toy in the head.
# Du watch every movie Tony mentions on the Zeigen for 2 reasons, either because Du are interested in the movie, oder simply because Du do everything that Tony says.
# Du seriously consider getting a coffin to sleep in.
# Du say your occupation is "making Fan art and Schreiben Fan fiction"
# Du take part in all the active threads on the site
# You've created about half the active threads on the site
# Du start listening to Israeli rap.
# Du make Mii's of all the Navy CIS Characters on your Wii (Even Lee and Fornell)
# Du learn how to kill with a paper clip
# Your idea of computer maintenance is to continually hit it until it works.
# Du start calling everyone named Abigail, "Abbs" (I do this with my friend's daughter. --abbysciuto77)
# Du Google Bilder of female Israeli soldiers
# Du acquire an acute interest in the different post-mortem protocols
# Du discuss the pros and cons of the Scotland Yard and Virchow post-mortem protocols, likewise any of the others used
# Du hear something that Du swear is a quote from the Zeigen and whip out your dvd sets and watch until Du find that quote.
# Du start keeping an extra set of clothes at the office just in case
# Du call odd things in your life "hinky" (Guilty as charged!)
# Du call Mark Harmon/Jethro Gibbs oder any othersilver haired man in your life your "silver-haired fox"
# Du discover (or are reminded) that a "Gypsy" is an off the clock cab driver, not someone who tells fortunes and wears hoop earrings.
# Du get hubby/better half to wear a silver/steel ID bracelet like Gibbs'
# Du start wearing a silver/steel ID bracelet like Gibbs'
# Your whole family can quote Navy CIS even though they've never seen it.
# Du know everything there is to know about all the characters - permanent and occasional
# When your teacher/boss/parent tells Du to do some small job oder chore, Du say "Ya know, most agencies have people to do these things."
# Du create a Sims family of the Navy CIS cast
# Du think goth fashion is the most chic
# Du invent a role game of the series
# Du use this site banner for your own website/letter headings, etc.
# Du start Googling Ducky's stories to check for accuracy.
# Du spend a whole week reminding everyone Du know exactly how long it is until Navy CIS is on next.
# Du think April 8, 2008 should be a holiday. (First new episode after the strike!! Yay!)
# When Du get smacked on the back of your head, and your first words are "Thank Du Boss!"
# Du have watched the Cast Interrogation Videos ten dozen times already since they came out Tuesday 8th
# You've learned their Antwort to those Fragen off pat
# Du sign up with all the online Navy CIS sites
# Du can't stop posting on the Navy CIS Wiki.
# Du dream about NCIS
# Du wear out your DVD and the discs, from re-running marathons
# Du read all these statements and answered at least one with "positive".
# You've willingly joined Navy CIS Addicts Anonymous despite knowing there's no way out and the addiction only gets stronger
# Your German Shepherd is no longer called Rex but Jethro
# And if Du have a female German Shepherd Du will call her Jenny to keep it all in the family :-)
# Du start yelling at people who annoy Du "Bad McGee!"
# Du take your phone off the hook/switch your mobile to silent mode when watching an episode
# Family and Friends know they must not call Von phone/in person while you're watching an episode unless it's a Frage of life and death, and even then ....
# Du become obsessed with what the scriptwriters have in store for the cast
# Du draw comics of NCIS.
# Du write 'I Liebe NCIS' on any paper surface Du can find.
# Your friend can't stop talking about their crush and Du can't stop talking about NCIS.
# Du day/night dream NCIS
# Du can recognise the signature tune on the first bar
# Your mobile 'music' has Gibbs' voice, or
# Your mobile sms 'music' is Tony saying 'on it boss'
# Du organize your social life/holidays around the episode programming
# Navy CIS addiction is your religion
# When where ever Du go Du swear Du saw one of the team
# You're convinced they're one of the family
# Any medical problem requires a Sekunde opinion from Ducky
# If Du have a car accident oder industrial accident Du require Abby to do the loss adjustment/forensics before you're fully satisfied
# All your family pets are named after the cast members
# Du learn the Navy CIS theme on the Piano and/or other instruments and play it all the time
# Du think your other half looks handsome in a Hawaiian shirt
# Du think Hawaiian shirts are chic male fashion
# Du can dance to theme song of Navy CIS and sit down the Sekunde it ends
# Du always know the exact amount of time until the Weiter episode
# Du can't sleep thinking about who will die on the season finale
# Du spend class time/work time/time before Du go to sleep/time Du take to shampoo your hair dreaming up scenarios for the Weiter episode/your Fan fiction. (i know i do)
# Du Mitmachen all the internet Foren extant on the series
# Du spend your spare time reviewing/adding/editing the contents on this Wiki
# Du spend the rest of the time thinking about how to improve this Wiki
# When Du Mitmachen the Navy CIS Wiki
# When Du sign up on this addiction page - there's no way out
# Du become a mainline addict when all the walls of your abode are covered floor to ceiling with photos, etc., of NCIS
# Du drink Starbuck coffee, even if Du don't like it (and Du drink it black and sugarless)
# Du think of ways to Bewegen this site up in the Wiki ranking
# Du imitate Gibbs' saying of 'Today -insert name here- with your Friends and family when they're taking a long time in doing stuff(me and my dad do it all the time)
# Du name your computer McGee (i did it xD)
# Your Navy CIS season cd sometimes gets all hinky because Du watch the season over and over again (guilty!)
# Du make a Navy CIS poster and put it in your bedroom Wand oder consider looking at stores for a Navy CIS poster (I currently don't have one... but I will. :D)
# Du spend hours on the internet just to find a tune with the song Tony sang in the episode 'Driven' (the one that starts with 'in my perspective...' and so on... the part when Tony went undercover near the restaurant that The Frog's people ate)
# Du drink stuff that makes Du hyper (guilty... xD)
# Du cut your hair so Du can look like Abby/any character Du like to imitate
# Your family sometimes calls Du 'Ziva'
# Du act like your fave character (guilty!)
# Du ask your classmates/friends/coworkers if they know NCIS
# Your computer is loaded with mostly Navy CIS pics
# Du use terms from the Zeigen (for example, me and my family call a flash drive 'doodahs')
# Du wish Du had the Navy CIS cap/McGee's typewriter/Abby's farting hippo/Ziva's skills/Gibb's boat/DiNozzo's highly expensive shoes (yeah... sometimes. :D)
# Du do everything humanly and non-humanly possible to push this Wiki up in the Wiki ratings Du trust your gut, even when everything else goes against it.
# Du trust your gut, Mehr than facts oder figures.
# Du use 'hinky' to describe many things, even when people ask Du to repeat what Du say cause it sounds like something else.
# Du cry when Du don't hear Mark Harmon say " STAY TUNED FOR SCENES FROM OUR Weiter EPISODE"
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added by Serienjunkie91
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Source: Made Von me - flowerdrop
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Source: JCProductions
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Source: team-ncis.com
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Source: Jesse Stern
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Source: Gaillots