I found these online, and thought they were kinda funny, :)
Credit: wiki answers, wattpad.com, b L o g s p o t.com
How many Twilighters does it take to screw on a light bulb?
I don't know, they're all too busy fighting over who gets to be Mrs Cullen
What happened when Emmett Cullen stubbed his toe?
He made the whole city collapse!
Rosalie Hale was told to find something just as oder Mehr beautiful then herself. She came back with a mirror!
How do Du stop Jacob Black from attacking you?
You pick up a stick, throw it and yell "fetch"!
How do Du irritate Edward Cullen?
Buy him a dog and call it Jacob!