I suspect I'm not the only one, am I? XD...... Anyways, Du know you're obsessed with Bellatrix when....
Credit: Me Myself and I

1. Du throw away all of your hairbrushes.

2. Du wear at least some black every day.

3. Du rip your clothes on purpose.

4. Du call people Du don't like "filthy mudbloods".

5. Du yell "CRUCIO!" at people when Du get mad.

6. Du carry knives on your person

7. Your desktop background and screensaver are of Bellatrix.

8. Whenever you're typing a word that starts with a "B" oder an "L", Du accidentally type out a Bellatrix oder a Lestrange instead.

9. Du think her birthday should...

Credit: mugglenet.com

1. Make him take a shower.

2. Make him use shampoo in aforementioned shower.

3. Make him use clarifying shampoo.

4. Apparate Weiter to him, hand him a tube of super-strong facial cleanser, then quickly Disapparate before he realizes what happened.

5. Enchant this cleanser to follow him around until he uses it.

6. ...enchant the cleanser to follow him around anyway.

7. Tell him Du stahl, stola his teddy bear.

8. Tell him Du won't give it back until he agrees to wash his hair.

9. When he washes his hair, tell him Du were just kidding and sagte teddy bär has already been destroyed.

10. Sneak...

A handy-dandy Wikihow Artikel on how to make a horcrux, for all Du aspiring Dark witches and wizards out there!
Credit: wikihow.com

1. Become an extremely powerful witch oder wizard. This will take years of study and sacrifice which lie beyond the scope of a WikiHow article. As a general guide Du should not attempt to create a horcrux until Du can cast non-verbal killing curses.

2. Locate an object of extreme significance to you. An emotional attachment to the object will aid the process and make it easier on your body and soul.

3. Bathe in the Water of Sorrows and eat 1 cup of paste made from...