Du know what trend I’m getting kinda tired of? The whole “Princess has been kidnapped, go save her”. I’m not an extremist feminist, but the whole princess thing is kinda getting old. So, naturally, I felt the best thing to do was to make a Liste of the oben, nach oben ten best. So, the rules for this Liste are as followed. Only from games that I have played, and only one game per franchise. So, with all of that sagte and done, let us start the list
#10: Princess Daphne from Dragon’s Lair
Okay…….. This is a bit hard to get behind. What, in the name of god, is this princess wearing. I mean… this piece of clothing a very revealing, don’t Du think? Oh well, Princess Daphne is a princess tuck in a bubble that awaits a knight (That knight being dolch, dirk the Daring) to save her from the dragon so she could marry him. First off, how did she get kidnapped, and secondly, she’s in a bubble. Just pop the damn thing. So, Du may be thinking, if she is kinda useless, why is she on the Liste at all. And to you, I say Don Bluth. Yep, the same man that brought us Secret of Nimh and Land Before Time brought us incredibly revealing blonde useless princess. And if that reason isn’t good enough for Du people, than…. revealing dress for all the perverts out there. That’s it, that’s my reason. Weiter entry
#9: Princess Plump from Fat Princess
God, this game is so mean, that even the Titel hates the princess. But for someone who eats so much cake, she probably doesn’t care anymore how fat she gets. Princess Plump is a princess who is always in need of getting back to her castle, and Du need to get her there. However, that’s easier sagte than done, as Princess Plump will always go out of her way to go and devour whatever cake she can find along the way. With each piece of cake she eats, she gets fatter and fatter, as well as heavier, making it slower for her to get back to her castle. And if Du think that’s bad, wait until Du have to fight off swarms of enemies badly wanting to steal her. It’s bad enough Du got to defend a walking piece of Inflation characters that looks like it was taken from DeviantArt, but now Du gotta fight off enemies. Oh well, at least she was okay in Playstation All Stars…. I think… I don’t know, I never played it. Also, Princess Plump is voiced Von Tara Strong… Best damn character of all time instantly.
#8: Princess from Braid (SPOILERS)
Though she doesn’t have a name, she has a lot to do with the story. Throughout the game, Du are told that the Princess was taken Von an evil monster, and that Tim says that “he has done something terrible”, so, throughout the game, Du solve dozens of puzzles in hopes of saving the Princess. At the end of the game, Du finally do find the Princess, and Du follow her, who makes it seem as though Du are working with her to help solve puzzles and traps in order to escape. However, this entire scene was only played in reverse. When it goes vorwärts-, nach vorn in time, it shows the player that the entire time, the Princess was activating traps for Tim to stop him until she is saved from a knight, revealing that Tim was, in fact, the monster all along. That is some deep stuff. Then again, this is Braid we’re talking about
#7: Witch Princess from Harvest Moon
Goddamn it, it’s one of those tsundere princesses. Although she isn’t… AS BAD as some tsunderes, so there’s that. At the beginning of the game, the Witch Princess casts a spell on the Harvest Goddess, turning her into stone Von accident. Though she did, she still feels that it isn’t her fault. However, somehow, the protagonist of the game manages to get involved in her problems, and now has to help her fix it. Other than that, she will also gladly appreciate it if Du do minor things, as she is a mischievous and rude girl. She likes it when Du drop things on the ground, throw away food… give people poisonous mushrooms…. and kill your pets… Well, this got freaking dark. However, Du are also able to actually marry the Witch Princess like any other girl in this game…. just give her 10,000 gifts in total… I wish I was kidding
#6: Princess pfirsich from Super Mario Bros.
Yes, I know she’s iconic and in the most beliebt video game franchise ever, but beliebt isn’t always good. Hitler’s popular, but is he good? No. (Did I really compare a Nintendo princess to a fascist dictator?) The reason she is not in the oben, nach oben five is because all she does in the main series is get kidnapped… Again…. and again…. and again…. and every single Tag until she dies. Occasionally she drives a car and knocks a Tennis ball around… but that’s about it… UNTIL LATER! Soon, pfirsich became very useful in games like Super Paper Mario, where she tried to intimidate Francis after he steal Tippi. And in her own spin-off game, Super Princess Peach, a game where both Mario and Luigi are kidnapped, pfirsich goes to save them… with hormones. I could make a period joke, but that would be pushing the PG-13 limits. Princess Peach. Useless in the main series, but awesome in the spin-offs.
#5: Ashe from Final Fantasy XII
Oh boy, here we go with the controversy. Ashe was once a princess of Dalmasca, before she left after the ridicule she had received from the people. Now, she wishes to restore her family name for her people. Though not the best character in Final Fantasy XII, she is still tolerable. She is a fierce and proud young girl, loyal to her team. However, she still manages to be rather childish at times, as she does have some memories of her childhood. And unlike most royal members, she tries to avoid such things, as she believes that she will be corrupted Von such things and turn her away from her pure hearted self, which honestly makes her such a wonderful character. Yeah, I know, she is no Balthier, my personal Favorit FFXIII character, but, hey, at least she isn’t Vaan (Oh, damn. That was a worse burn than the Great feuer of Rome).
#4: Kitana from Mortal Kombat
Finally. A princess who can take care of herself. Kitana is over a 10,000 years old, but that is considered young in the realm of Edenia. I’d hate to see how many years Du have to be to be considered an old man. Anyway, she is the stepfather of Shao Kahn, who soon became her enemy, as she did what she could to save the realm of Edenia, even making a small army in Outworld. Oh, and she had some Liebe interest with Liu Kang, I don’t know. I only saw that happen in Mortal Kombat 9, and I Frage why a princess would Liebe whiny Liu Kang from Mortal Kombat 9. Kitana usually fights with battle fans, which are covered with blades she uses Von either swinging, throwing, oder creating gusts of winds to immobilize her enemies, just to name a few tactics. Also, she was used to created Melinna, which is known for those… goddamn terrifying pair of teeth. And this is why we never make clones of any character. Because Du make…. THAT!
#3: Sun Lian from Jade Empire (SPOILERS)
Oh, another princess who can take care of herself. We’re on a role. Sun Lian is not like your typical princess (Obviously). She is actually Silk Fox, the woman in the black vail Du met before in the game. Silk fuchs is seen as a mysterious young and beautiful woman who seems to be able to fight as good as Du do, and nearly does try to kill Du after she mistakes Du for an attack on your Home town. After Du beat her, she does apologize and does what she can to help you, Von helping Du find Master Li, and get Du a flyer to get across the world easier. She is also one of the best fighters in the game, allowing for a lot of perfect combos and help in battles. And the craziest part is that Du can actually datum her. In this game, as a guy, Du can datum two girls. Your childhood friend, Dawn Star, oder Sun Lian. Or, if you're a real pervert, Du can have, as the Wiki describes, a menage a trois… I wish I made that up. That’s actually in the game
#2: Princess Zelda from The Legend of Zelda
Du all knew she’d be on this list. Du all knew that this is my Favorit franchise. Zelda is easily the best Nintendo princess. Better than anything Mario can produce. Zelda is a peaceful and pure hearted princess, who believes in the protection and care for Hyrule and it’s people, which is easier sagte than done, seeing as how it is the Home to evil green skinned wizards, evil masks, a giant sea monster, a masked… thing, and a black guy with flaming hair. She is also able to take care of herself Mehr than any Nintendo princess can. She can either be a ninja named Sheik who can teach Link different songs and hide from Ganondorf for seven years, oder she can be a young pirate captain who bosses around men double her size. She can be giant knight who fights foes for Link, oder just be herself and kick arsch that way. It doesn’t matter which version of Zelda it is. She is amazing in any version
#1: Princess Nadia/Marle from Chrono Trigger (SPOILERS)
If I couldn’t choose Zelda, than I would just have to choose someone who was just as awesome, if not even Mehr awesome. Princess Nadia goes Von the name Marle in order to hide her true name from everyone so she can just be a normal girl living her usual life. As a princess, her mother died when she was a little girl, and her father had become much Mehr bitter since her death. This soon sparked some problems between Marle and her father, soon leading to the King rejecting her as his daughter and Marle down right despising him, which this is only shown in Marle’s side quest. Though Marle may have problems with her father, she still believes in helping him, and trying to make him happy again. And not only is she helpful towards her father, she is a really good party member to have. Sure, her physical attacks aren’t too good, but her magic attacks are incredible, and her healing is definitely nothing to scoff at either. And I easily prefer Marle’s side mission over anyone else's. Yes, moreover Robo’s, moreover Magus’s, moreover the damn tree, which I thought was the best until I played through this one. It is just that incredible, and so is Marle.
Well, there Du have it. Did Du enjoy the list? Tell me what Du thought of it. With that said, I will see Du all Weiter time.
#10: Princess Daphne from Dragon’s Lair
Okay…….. This is a bit hard to get behind. What, in the name of god, is this princess wearing. I mean… this piece of clothing a very revealing, don’t Du think? Oh well, Princess Daphne is a princess tuck in a bubble that awaits a knight (That knight being dolch, dirk the Daring) to save her from the dragon so she could marry him. First off, how did she get kidnapped, and secondly, she’s in a bubble. Just pop the damn thing. So, Du may be thinking, if she is kinda useless, why is she on the Liste at all. And to you, I say Don Bluth. Yep, the same man that brought us Secret of Nimh and Land Before Time brought us incredibly revealing blonde useless princess. And if that reason isn’t good enough for Du people, than…. revealing dress for all the perverts out there. That’s it, that’s my reason. Weiter entry
#9: Princess Plump from Fat Princess
God, this game is so mean, that even the Titel hates the princess. But for someone who eats so much cake, she probably doesn’t care anymore how fat she gets. Princess Plump is a princess who is always in need of getting back to her castle, and Du need to get her there. However, that’s easier sagte than done, as Princess Plump will always go out of her way to go and devour whatever cake she can find along the way. With each piece of cake she eats, she gets fatter and fatter, as well as heavier, making it slower for her to get back to her castle. And if Du think that’s bad, wait until Du have to fight off swarms of enemies badly wanting to steal her. It’s bad enough Du got to defend a walking piece of Inflation characters that looks like it was taken from DeviantArt, but now Du gotta fight off enemies. Oh well, at least she was okay in Playstation All Stars…. I think… I don’t know, I never played it. Also, Princess Plump is voiced Von Tara Strong… Best damn character of all time instantly.
#8: Princess from Braid (SPOILERS)
Though she doesn’t have a name, she has a lot to do with the story. Throughout the game, Du are told that the Princess was taken Von an evil monster, and that Tim says that “he has done something terrible”, so, throughout the game, Du solve dozens of puzzles in hopes of saving the Princess. At the end of the game, Du finally do find the Princess, and Du follow her, who makes it seem as though Du are working with her to help solve puzzles and traps in order to escape. However, this entire scene was only played in reverse. When it goes vorwärts-, nach vorn in time, it shows the player that the entire time, the Princess was activating traps for Tim to stop him until she is saved from a knight, revealing that Tim was, in fact, the monster all along. That is some deep stuff. Then again, this is Braid we’re talking about
#7: Witch Princess from Harvest Moon
Goddamn it, it’s one of those tsundere princesses. Although she isn’t… AS BAD as some tsunderes, so there’s that. At the beginning of the game, the Witch Princess casts a spell on the Harvest Goddess, turning her into stone Von accident. Though she did, she still feels that it isn’t her fault. However, somehow, the protagonist of the game manages to get involved in her problems, and now has to help her fix it. Other than that, she will also gladly appreciate it if Du do minor things, as she is a mischievous and rude girl. She likes it when Du drop things on the ground, throw away food… give people poisonous mushrooms…. and kill your pets… Well, this got freaking dark. However, Du are also able to actually marry the Witch Princess like any other girl in this game…. just give her 10,000 gifts in total… I wish I was kidding
#6: Princess pfirsich from Super Mario Bros.
Yes, I know she’s iconic and in the most beliebt video game franchise ever, but beliebt isn’t always good. Hitler’s popular, but is he good? No. (Did I really compare a Nintendo princess to a fascist dictator?) The reason she is not in the oben, nach oben five is because all she does in the main series is get kidnapped… Again…. and again…. and again…. and every single Tag until she dies. Occasionally she drives a car and knocks a Tennis ball around… but that’s about it… UNTIL LATER! Soon, pfirsich became very useful in games like Super Paper Mario, where she tried to intimidate Francis after he steal Tippi. And in her own spin-off game, Super Princess Peach, a game where both Mario and Luigi are kidnapped, pfirsich goes to save them… with hormones. I could make a period joke, but that would be pushing the PG-13 limits. Princess Peach. Useless in the main series, but awesome in the spin-offs.
#5: Ashe from Final Fantasy XII
Oh boy, here we go with the controversy. Ashe was once a princess of Dalmasca, before she left after the ridicule she had received from the people. Now, she wishes to restore her family name for her people. Though not the best character in Final Fantasy XII, she is still tolerable. She is a fierce and proud young girl, loyal to her team. However, she still manages to be rather childish at times, as she does have some memories of her childhood. And unlike most royal members, she tries to avoid such things, as she believes that she will be corrupted Von such things and turn her away from her pure hearted self, which honestly makes her such a wonderful character. Yeah, I know, she is no Balthier, my personal Favorit FFXIII character, but, hey, at least she isn’t Vaan (Oh, damn. That was a worse burn than the Great feuer of Rome).
#4: Kitana from Mortal Kombat
Finally. A princess who can take care of herself. Kitana is over a 10,000 years old, but that is considered young in the realm of Edenia. I’d hate to see how many years Du have to be to be considered an old man. Anyway, she is the stepfather of Shao Kahn, who soon became her enemy, as she did what she could to save the realm of Edenia, even making a small army in Outworld. Oh, and she had some Liebe interest with Liu Kang, I don’t know. I only saw that happen in Mortal Kombat 9, and I Frage why a princess would Liebe whiny Liu Kang from Mortal Kombat 9. Kitana usually fights with battle fans, which are covered with blades she uses Von either swinging, throwing, oder creating gusts of winds to immobilize her enemies, just to name a few tactics. Also, she was used to created Melinna, which is known for those… goddamn terrifying pair of teeth. And this is why we never make clones of any character. Because Du make…. THAT!
#3: Sun Lian from Jade Empire (SPOILERS)
Oh, another princess who can take care of herself. We’re on a role. Sun Lian is not like your typical princess (Obviously). She is actually Silk Fox, the woman in the black vail Du met before in the game. Silk fuchs is seen as a mysterious young and beautiful woman who seems to be able to fight as good as Du do, and nearly does try to kill Du after she mistakes Du for an attack on your Home town. After Du beat her, she does apologize and does what she can to help you, Von helping Du find Master Li, and get Du a flyer to get across the world easier. She is also one of the best fighters in the game, allowing for a lot of perfect combos and help in battles. And the craziest part is that Du can actually datum her. In this game, as a guy, Du can datum two girls. Your childhood friend, Dawn Star, oder Sun Lian. Or, if you're a real pervert, Du can have, as the Wiki describes, a menage a trois… I wish I made that up. That’s actually in the game
#2: Princess Zelda from The Legend of Zelda
Du all knew she’d be on this list. Du all knew that this is my Favorit franchise. Zelda is easily the best Nintendo princess. Better than anything Mario can produce. Zelda is a peaceful and pure hearted princess, who believes in the protection and care for Hyrule and it’s people, which is easier sagte than done, seeing as how it is the Home to evil green skinned wizards, evil masks, a giant sea monster, a masked… thing, and a black guy with flaming hair. She is also able to take care of herself Mehr than any Nintendo princess can. She can either be a ninja named Sheik who can teach Link different songs and hide from Ganondorf for seven years, oder she can be a young pirate captain who bosses around men double her size. She can be giant knight who fights foes for Link, oder just be herself and kick arsch that way. It doesn’t matter which version of Zelda it is. She is amazing in any version
#1: Princess Nadia/Marle from Chrono Trigger (SPOILERS)
If I couldn’t choose Zelda, than I would just have to choose someone who was just as awesome, if not even Mehr awesome. Princess Nadia goes Von the name Marle in order to hide her true name from everyone so she can just be a normal girl living her usual life. As a princess, her mother died when she was a little girl, and her father had become much Mehr bitter since her death. This soon sparked some problems between Marle and her father, soon leading to the King rejecting her as his daughter and Marle down right despising him, which this is only shown in Marle’s side quest. Though Marle may have problems with her father, she still believes in helping him, and trying to make him happy again. And not only is she helpful towards her father, she is a really good party member to have. Sure, her physical attacks aren’t too good, but her magic attacks are incredible, and her healing is definitely nothing to scoff at either. And I easily prefer Marle’s side mission over anyone else's. Yes, moreover Robo’s, moreover Magus’s, moreover the damn tree, which I thought was the best until I played through this one. It is just that incredible, and so is Marle.
Well, there Du have it. Did Du enjoy the list? Tell me what Du thought of it. With that said, I will see Du all Weiter time.
In case it wasn't clear since my Grand Theft Auto reviews, I am much Mehr interesting in when Rockstar does something other than GTA games. I find that stuff to be way Mehr fun. And the first of many (Okay, three) to appear on this Liste is the murder mystery classic, L.A. Noire-
*Blowing Whistle* Stop right there! I’m taking over this review!
Several years Vor I found this Rockstar game.. LA NOIRE. Now, when I first got this game, I was fresh of GTA 4 and Red Dead Redemption.. I was introduced to GTA Von the 4th, never played the others. But obviously we aren't here to talk about...
Oh boy, this is a classic gem I’ve been waiting to discuss… again… for the fourth time in a row now. It’s no secret that I Liebe Platinum. Anarchy Reigns was the first Platinum game on this list, and the rest of them are only gonna get better from here. And let’s talk about their first game, and while not a financial success, still a classic on the Wii, Madworld.
Madworld follows angry biker Jack Cayman, as he and his trustworthy chainsaw arm, go through the crazed gameshow known as Death Watch in order to take out the competition and become the champion of Death Watch. The game...
#1:SULLIVAN:
As Du already know.
I kinda stopped playing for a bit, Sullivan is why.
Not to mention. I was shocked the first time. I was starting to like Sullivan..
#2: CHEF ANTOINE:
I think we covered this one :)
#3: BACHMAYER:
Near the end of the 3rd game, Max Payne fights this guy.
It's hard to explain, why it's so hard, just have to see it yourself..
#4: BECKER:
Last boss of Max Payne 3.
And really holds the "last boss" feeling.
In a negative way..
#5: WESKER:
The main villain of Resident evil 5. And final boss..
#6: CEASER:
The final boss of Assasins Creed 3..
As Du already know.
I kinda stopped playing for a bit, Sullivan is why.
Not to mention. I was shocked the first time. I was starting to like Sullivan..
#2: CHEF ANTOINE:
I think we covered this one :)
#3: BACHMAYER:
Near the end of the 3rd game, Max Payne fights this guy.
It's hard to explain, why it's so hard, just have to see it yourself..
#4: BECKER:
Last boss of Max Payne 3.
And really holds the "last boss" feeling.
In a negative way..
#5: WESKER:
The main villain of Resident evil 5. And final boss..
#6: CEASER:
The final boss of Assasins Creed 3..
What in the name of god. They are already ready remaking Grand Theft Auto 5.
Now, don't get me wrong. I Liebe Grand Theft Auto 5. I think it is one of the funnest games I have played in 2013. But, seriously, it's only one Jahr old, and already they are remaking it for Playstation 4 and XBox One. Seriously, Du should at least give a game some time to age before Du remake it. Look at Ocarina of Time, a game which people sagte is the greatest game ever, which was made back in 1999. The remake for the 3DS wasn't made until 2012, which is years later. Honestly, they are already remaking GTA 5. Sure, the graphics are better, but the thing is that the graphics were amazing to begin with. Why are Du remaking this game so early, Rockstar. But, hey, that's only my opinion. What's Your Take
Now, don't get me wrong. I Liebe Grand Theft Auto 5. I think it is one of the funnest games I have played in 2013. But, seriously, it's only one Jahr old, and already they are remaking it for Playstation 4 and XBox One. Seriously, Du should at least give a game some time to age before Du remake it. Look at Ocarina of Time, a game which people sagte is the greatest game ever, which was made back in 1999. The remake for the 3DS wasn't made until 2012, which is years later. Honestly, they are already remaking GTA 5. Sure, the graphics are better, but the thing is that the graphics were amazing to begin with. Why are Du remaking this game so early, Rockstar. But, hey, that's only my opinion. What's Your Take
*ding dong*
???: what is it?
Henry: hello Simon
Simon: Henry! Du still wearing that tux?
Henry: every chance I get
Simon: heh... oh... Du brought soldiers
Dex: why does everyone think i'm a soldier?
Marcus: no idea...
Henry: Du seem calmer since the last time a saw you...
Simon: I take pills... anyway, why are Du here?
Henry: we need Du back
Simon: no way! i'm NOT going back to Klintsy!
Henry: we are close to taking down Harper and Dominic.
Simon: why don't fight your own war!
Henry: Du are the only one that knows Harper and his tactics.
Simon: ok then, come inside so I can teach Du
Henry: Du and I both know that he still has some sanity left...
Simon: ... *sigh* lets go...
???: what is it?
Henry: hello Simon
Simon: Henry! Du still wearing that tux?
Henry: every chance I get
Simon: heh... oh... Du brought soldiers
Dex: why does everyone think i'm a soldier?
Marcus: no idea...
Henry: Du seem calmer since the last time a saw you...
Simon: I take pills... anyway, why are Du here?
Henry: we need Du back
Simon: no way! i'm NOT going back to Klintsy!
Henry: we are close to taking down Harper and Dominic.
Simon: why don't fight your own war!
Henry: Du are the only one that knows Harper and his tactics.
Simon: ok then, come inside so I can teach Du
Henry: Du and I both know that he still has some sanity left...
Simon: ... *sigh* lets go...
Art by SeantheHedgehog
#80: Corpse Party: Tortured Souls
Now, there was a game known as Corpse Party that was made back in 1998- Von god, it’s that old. Anyway, there was then an Anime based off of the game… Fifteen years after the game was made. But, other than that, the Anime was good. For an Anime that only has four episodes, it was actually kinda good. The series was about a group of kids who accidently make a mistake with a paper doll, and are then sent to a cursed elementary school. Here, they have to try and figure out what is going on, while a psychotic ghost girl picks them off one Von one. Now, if...
continue reading...
Now, there was a game known as Corpse Party that was made back in 1998- Von god, it’s that old. Anyway, there was then an Anime based off of the game… Fifteen years after the game was made. But, other than that, the Anime was good. For an Anime that only has four episodes, it was actually kinda good. The series was about a group of kids who accidently make a mistake with a paper doll, and are then sent to a cursed elementary school. Here, they have to try and figure out what is going on, while a psychotic ghost girl picks them off one Von one. Now, if...
