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posted by iluvsmj
A mother was working in the kitchen, listening to her five-year-old son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop & her son saying, "All of Du bastards who want off, get the hell off now, 'cause this is the last stop! And all of Du bastards who are getting on, get your arsch in the train, cause we're going down the tracks."

The horrified mother went in & told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want Du to go to your room & stay there for TWO HOURS. When Du come out,you may play with your train, but I want you...
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posted by vlad_todd_fan
This is A TRUE STORY AND IF Du DON'T PASS THIS ON Du DON'T HAVE A SOUL!!!

My name is Chris,
I am three,
My eyes are swollen..
I cannot see.

I must be stupid,
I must be bad,
What else could have made,
My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better,
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy,
Would still want to hug me.

I can't do a wrong,
I can't speak at all,
Or else I'm locked up,
All Tag long.

When I'm awake,
I'm all alone,
The house is dark,
My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come home,
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll just get,
One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car,
My daddy is back,
From Charlie's bar

I hear...
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posted by rAsberrStrarS
KISS On The Lips-I Liebe You
KISS On The Ear-You Are Special
KISS On The Nose-Laughter
KISS On The Cheek-Friendship
KISS On The Forehead-I Comfort You
KISS On The Neck-I Want You
KISS On The Shoulder-You Are Wonderful
KISS Anywhere Else-Be Careful
Play Around With Hair-Can't Live Without You
Holding Hands-Happiness
Arms Around Waist-You Are Mine,I Need You
A Hug-I Care
Nibble On Ear-Start Warming
Smiling At Each Other-I Like You
Lifting Eyebrows/Wink-Flirtation
Looking Around-Hiding True Feelings
Tender KISS On The Side Of Your Lips-You're Mine
Wetting Your Lips-Waiting For A Kiss
Tear Drop-I'm Losing You
Crying-I Lost Du
20. Yoruichi Shihoin from "Bleach" Cool, Smart, fast, strong and she can turn into a cat, Yoruichi is the bomb. Even her former student Soi-Fon loves and respects her.
 The MASTER of female shinigami.
The MASTER of female shinigami.

19. Kushina Uzamaki from "Naruto" The mother of the main character Kushina get's little time in the sires cause she's dead but that doesn't stop her from being totally kick arsch in life.
 The red hot-blooded habanero.
The red hot-blooded habanero.

18. Mana from "Yu-Gi-Oh!" My Favorit Yu-Gi-Oh girl...Fun, pretty and AWESOME. Mana is one of the strongest and few girls in this sires about guys.
 The original dark magician girl.
The original dark magician...
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posted by kitkat709477
GIrls only (or gay guys..) yea both So Du have to read this now....haha for girls eyes only here all girls! Hey girls! IF YOU'RE A BOY, LEAVE THIS CUZ IT RUINS EVERYTHING GIRL TALK: Did Du know Küssen is healthy. It's good to cry. Chicken suppe actually makes Du feel better. 94% of boys would Liebe it if Du sent them flowers. Lying is actually unhealthy. Only apply mascara to your oben, nach oben lashes. It's actually true, boys DO insult Du when they like you! 89% of guys want Du to make the 1st move. Ya but 99.99% of girls want guys to make the first move. Schokolade will make Du feel better! Most...
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Ok so me and my friend Liebe the mall but what makes it Mehr fun are the following

-When your Lost looking for a store ask them in a british accents! here's an example "Pardon me, could Du please point me in the direction of ______" (if u are british do it in a differnt accent like american austraian ect.)

-When Du go into a store adress your friend Von a differnt name and have a weird personality

-if Du go into one of those store that plays the Musik REALLY loud, sing along like there's nobody else in the store but Du and ur friend.

-Have weird conversations about Zufällig things. like terrorists oder something

Have fun with Friends at the mall!
posted by ilovepenguins
I didn't write this!


Sell used bus tickets. Claim they are for half the price.

Get on the bus, grinning widely. As soon as the bus begins to move, burst into song. When Du arrive at the Weiter stop, stop singing. Step off the bus backwards, still grinning widely.

If Du are seated between two passengers, yawn loudly, strech, and put your arms around them.

Greet passengers with a big hug, handshake, smile and say ³Hi, call me Norman²

Put a leash on a friend and walk him/her onto the bus. Insist he/she is a dog and should go for half fare.

When arriving at your stop, do not push the button to...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
a boy was asked Von his teacher to pick some spelling words for his homework. the boy goes Home and asks his mum "what's a good spelling word?" and the mother Antworten " Shutup, i'm busy", so he writes it down.
he goes to his dad and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and the dad Antworten "da na na na Batman!" so he writes it down.
next he goes to his older sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she Antworten "yeah yeah" so the boy writes it down.
he goes to his younger sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she Antworten "lollipop, lollipop" so he writes it down.
Finally he goes...
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Okay so here's Part 2 :)

21.
Name: Keir O'Donnell (Actor)
From: Paul Blart: Mall Cop
Character: Veck
Attraction: Just everything - he's very beautiful



22.
Name: Tom Chambers (Actor)
From: Waterloo Road
Character: Max Tyler
Attraction: His lovely eyes

link

23.
Name: Jack diwan, davenport (Actor)
From: Pirates Of The Caribbean 1-3
Character: James Norrington
Attraction: His smile and actually just him in general - he's like a prince lol



24.
Name: Jonas Armstrong (Actor)
From: Robin Hood
Character: Robin Hood
Attraction: His cheeky smile and I like his accent too



25.
Name: Ed Westwick (Actor)
From:...
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added by fanfly
Source: wallpaperswide.com
 The Mew pudding goes "Na no da"
The Mew Pudding goes "Na no da"
20. pudding Fon "Tokyo mew mew" The cuties character in the Anime she's hyper, active and has the best Liebe interest despite not being the main character and only eight years old.

19.Hiei from "Yu Yu Hakusho" Hiei has the darkest life. He was thrown off a cliff as a child, torn from his family, Lost the only thing he had of them and then his sister was captured Von the UGLIEST of all fat greedy bastards. No not the one from Disney's "Pocahontas".
 A sucky life gave him an attitude everyone loves
A sucky life gave him an attitude everyone loves

18.Snow White from "Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs" The most innocent of the Disney princess naive,...
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I'm bored, so I thought I'd share with Du a few websites online that Du can Design characters! Du all probably have either created characters, like for fanfictions, stories, oder just in your mind, and here are some websites where Du can Design their appearance! oder Du could always make yourself and use it as a snazzy avatar/profile pic, oder make characters from books/movies/etc. that already exist! There are tons of websites out there, these are just a few.
link
This website is Von far the best superhero generator I've found. Basically Du use it to make your dream superhero!!! (I use it to...
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posted by Feathershine
1. Flick pencil erasers at the teacher then deny it
2. Say "I'm annoying u! I'm annoying u! I'm annoying u!.." keep doing it and see the teachers reaction
3. Pass notes in class, and when they tell u to stop say "we were sharing notes"
4. During Suisse/tests when everything is quiet say "Why is it so quiet in here?"
5. During tests when your done, turn in your chair if someone else is done, start whispering across the room to them
6. When your in the hallways push people and yell "PUSH AND SHOVE!!"
7. During tests/quizes turn to someone who's finished and mimic them
8. Steal peoples supplies then...
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posted by zanesaaomgfan
1. Ask him why did he marry a woman like your mom

2. Tell him Du met a guy in school

3. Sing a song he hates

4(reply to number 3) When he plays a song he likes, ask: "What awful music. How do Du listen to that crap?"

5. When he is driving you(anywhere), constantly ask "where are we going?"

6. Call him Von his name[Not so risky, always done it as a kid!]

7. When he lectures you, after he finishes it, ask him: "Ever heard of breath mint?"

8. Tell him that Justin Bieber is your Favorit guy[If Du hate Bieber, go with Cody Simpson oder some who Du like ALLOT!]

9. Come Home saying Du found your true...
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added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
Okay so if Du live on the eastcoast u are probably getting used to the snow..........so even if u aren't, everybody has the problem of having nothing to do when it snows but sled. So these are a few of the things that i enjoy to do.........hehe!

1. Fill balloons with water. Then leave them outside overnight.............yeah i'm this stupid. The Weiter day, cut the balloons off and Du got.........AN ICE BALL!! (i usually make like 15) Then use them to pay dodgeball. This is especially fun to do in deep snow, when Du can barely Bewegen as it is. Technically, u could use them to do various things,...
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posted by someone_save_me
These are just some, Mehr will probably be added later.

I hate:
-Animal abusers
-Child abusers
-Butthurt moralfags (If Du get mad at me saying moralfags, well then, Du must be new here. I'm not homophobic.)
-3/4 the mainstream crap on the radio
-Jersey Shore
-Homophobes
-People who don't thank Du when Du open a door for them
-Toddlers and Tiaras
-People who are always snooPING AS usual I see. /shot so fuckin' hard
-Fuckers who judge people Von their appearance
-When my computer breaks down
-Fangirls who get mad at if Du aren't borderline insanely obsessed with the same thing they are (Go on the Michael...
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added by HAPPY-LIFE
added by SummerThunder
Source: Martz90
added by Rodz
Source: photobucket