1. Stuff one of those giant dodgeballs (the ones Du all used to play dodgeball at gym oder recess when it was legal) under your hemd, shirt and tell him your pregnant with his child.

2. While he's sleeping rub his bulge and watch him moan and squirm in his sleep. (Run when he wakes up!)

3. Come up behind him while he's talking to royalty at a royal banquet, cover his eyes and flirtily coo "guess who?"

4. Give the goblins meth and release them out into the goblin city.

5. Interfere with his dates/loves Von locking them into several of the oubliettes in the labyrinth.

6. For guys only: ask to borrow some Viagra.

7. Prank call him and ask is ur refrigerator running? If he says no then say "well if it is you'd better go catch it!"

8. Sing the cuppycake song to him for his bday. (Look it up on YouTube)

9. Get all the guests attending his birthday celebration to sing along.

10. Ask him to sing Within Du with screamo vocals.

11. When he says "fear me Liebe me do as I say and I will be your slave," ask him if he wants to participate with Du in BDSM.

12. Inform him that the inhabitants of the underground are displeased with his ruling and have started a riot. Tell him he must change his name to Ziggy Stardust and escape to the planet with the spiders from Mars.

13. Tell him he needs to get a job at Hot Topic.
14. Take him to the prom as your prom date.
15. Teach him how to twerk.
16. Record him twerking on your iPhone and Upload the clip onto YouTube and Titel it: The Goblin King Twerking at *insert school name* puts Miley Cyrus to Shame.
17. Have a "white girls day" with jareth at Starbucks. Make sure to take pics and put them on ur instagram.

18. Tell him that Dr. Franknfurter from RHPS has Mehr glitter than thee and he's got competition.
19. Watch the glitter war begin
20. Persuade him not to use the bog of eternal stench anymore as punishment instead persuade him to use medieval era torture techniques on his poorly behaved subjects.

21. Inform him that half the worlds pfirsich supply comes frm a country that's suffering from Ebola.
22. Tell jareth pride is one of the seven deadly sins.
23. Tell him he's better off being an atheist.
24. Have Siri on his phone call him "master".
25. Send a severely autocorrected text message to him updating him about the runners progress through the labyrinth.

Hope Du enjoy! ;)