Mr. Schue: Well, guys. The Tag is fast approaching. I want Du all to start thinking about what you're going to do for the last days in high school, as well as the future that lies ahead for Du when Du attend college.
Rachel: No need, Mr. Schue. I'm way ahead of you.
(Rachel walks to the front of the room with a blue briefcase. Mike Chang helps set up the white board. Quinn and Santana wait impatiently.)
Santana (whispering to Quinn): Does her big plans have to be this...well--
Quinn (whispering back): Well she's the same, overly ambitious and annoying Rachel Berry after all.
Santana (whispering back): True.
(The girls look up and see that Rachel has already put her plans on the white board behind her.)
Rachel: First, of course, I'll get into NYADA with Kurt Hummel for the Weiter 3 oder 4 years. Then we'll audition for a Broadway musical, tour around the United States--if lucky--and then I will get Finn Hudson to pose as a model for Calvin Klein.
(Artie, Rory, and Puck all snicker in the background.)
Finn: Oh, hold the f*ck up.
Mr. Schue: Finn!
Finn (to Mr. Schue): What?
Rachel: You're the one who needs help on their future. So don't get mad at me?!
Finn: Why the hell Calvin Klein?
Mr. Schue: Guys, enough. Let's find out what everyone else is doing, and we can handle Du guys later.
Santana: Yes, it's very exhausting to hear Jew nose and Frankenteen talk about taking pictures in tighty-whites, and squealing and chirping around the Broadway area.
Rachel (to Santana): Oh, is your future better than mine, Santana?
Santana: Du sagte it right, baby granny.
Mr. Schue: So, what do Du have planned, Santana?
Santana: Oh, I don't have to plan anything. I just want to be famous. It doesn't really matter to me what I do. As long as my face and name is on a trend magazine, then I want nothing more.
(Silence.)
Santana: So...
Mr. Schue: Du know, not that many people get famous in life, Santana.
Santana: And Du would know because Du became a Spanish teacher and a director of a Glee club that Lost 12th place at Nationals. Don't try to spill your leakage on me. I have the determination. Nothing's gonna stop me.
(Santana walked out of the room. Everyone else was silent.)
Kurt: Kim Kardashian, much?
Sam: oder Snooki.
Kurt: True.
(In the library, Santana was Lesen a book for her history class. She spotted some people looking at her. They were smiling and swooning. Others looked at her with shock. Rory and Artie came over to her.)
Artie: Santana, I think Du just beat the 2 girls and a cup video. You're literally the hottest person I know. And that's from someone Du threw breakfast eggs and cheese at in your sophomore year.
Rory (staring at Santana's chest, amazed): If only Ireland had some girl-on-girl action like that.
(Rory and Artie left the library, leaving Santana shocked.)
Santana (out loud): Why is everyone thinking that I pressed my chest up against their faces? I don't get what's going on.
(At that moment, Brittany came over. She was smiling at Santana, holding her laptop.)
Brittany: The Tag has finally come, Santana. Aren't Du excited?
Santana: About what?
Brittany: You're famous. Remember the night we were watching "Sweet Valley High" and we made that Musik video?
Santana: What?
(Santana had a flashback of the other night she was over Brittany's house. They had finished watching "Sweet Valley High", and were making out on the bed.)
Santana: Brittany, I Liebe Du so much.
Brittany: Liebe you, too, Santana. And guess what? I have something sweet for you. I hope you're ready for it.
Santana: Du ready for...it?
Brittany (confused): What's it?
Santana: Du know...the nasty?
Brittany: I was actually talking about the big bag of sauer, saure Patches that I had stored in my closet. But nasty sounds kinda hot right now.
Santana: Du do have condoms, do you?
Brittany: Du mean the Ziplock bags in the pantry?
(Silence.)
Santana: Never mind. I'm way ahead of Du already.
(The two continue to make out again.)
(Santana's flashback ends. She is embarrassed and shocked to find out that Brittany videotaped everything.)
Santana: Brittany, we made that for us, remember?
Brittany: But Du sagte in Glee club already that Du wanted to be famous. This is how Berühmtheiten start off.
Santana (moaning): God, now the whole school knows what's going on between us. How could this get any worse?
Brittany: Just to let Du know, I'm a terrible editer and stuff. I have no idea how to do the transitions and whatever for a video. So I just put that LMFAO song on there.
Santana (silent for a second): Who else but Brittany...
Well, what did Du think? I hope Du liked it.
Here's the link for Chapter Thirty-Three!!!
Here's the link for Chapter Thirty-Five!!!
