10. Take her credit cards and shopping vouchers, hold them above your head and tell her to “jump for it”.
9. Tell her if she was just a few centimetres shorter she could legally be a midget.
8. Wear the trashiest possible clothing whenever Du can.
7. Tie her up in a straightjacket. When she protests, tell her she needs to go back to the loony bin.
6. When Du go into the sun with her, fall into a twitching heap on the ground and moan “I’m melting.”
5. Pelt her with cloves of garlic.
4. When she gets a vision, ask if her “spidey senses” are tingling.
3. Trip her up and ask if she saw it coming.
2. Ask her what Du will be doing in five Minuten every ten minutes.
And the Number One way to annoy Alice Cullen?
1. E-Mail her dozens of application forms for the position of speaker on psychic hotlines.
9. Tell her if she was just a few centimetres shorter she could legally be a midget.
8. Wear the trashiest possible clothing whenever Du can.
7. Tie her up in a straightjacket. When she protests, tell her she needs to go back to the loony bin.
6. When Du go into the sun with her, fall into a twitching heap on the ground and moan “I’m melting.”
5. Pelt her with cloves of garlic.
4. When she gets a vision, ask if her “spidey senses” are tingling.
3. Trip her up and ask if she saw it coming.
2. Ask her what Du will be doing in five Minuten every ten minutes.
And the Number One way to annoy Alice Cullen?
1. E-Mail her dozens of application forms for the position of speaker on psychic hotlines.
10. Sing “Discovery Channel” Von the Bloodhound Gang in your head whenever he is near.
9. Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.
8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.
7. Ask how Tanya is.
6. End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”
5. Call him Romeo both behind his back and to his face.
4. Whenever he complains oder argues, reply with “What are Du gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”
3. Tell him his hair isn’t bronze, it’s ginger, and he should stop denying himself – he’s a ranga.
2. Whenever he leaves a room oder says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.
And the Number One way to annoy Edward Cullen?
1. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” Von Madonna.
9. Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.
8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.
7. Ask how Tanya is.
6. End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”
5. Call him Romeo both behind his back and to his face.
4. Whenever he complains oder argues, reply with “What are Du gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”
3. Tell him his hair isn’t bronze, it’s ginger, and he should stop denying himself – he’s a ranga.
2. Whenever he leaves a room oder says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.
And the Number One way to annoy Edward Cullen?
1. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” Von Madonna.