Christentum
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Christentum Frage
I have a serious problem! What can I do to make it up to him?! ;'(
Du see...well...I kinda got some bad times goin on around me and it's affecting me pretty hard. It's kinda hard to explain and I'm really not good at explaining things so I'll try my best. I feel like I'm not a good enough christain. Sometimes I feel like a ful christain and sometimes I feel like a bad and negative child. It's like there's a good side and a bad side of me and that the bad side is growing and growing. And let me tell you, I truley do NOT want that bad side to fill me up all the way...there's a HUGE and SERIOUS problem I got that makes me think God is displeased of me about but too emberressed to say cause I don't want y'all to be mad at me about it either. I've trying so hard to deal with it but everytime, it doesn't feel right. All I know is that I'm tired of that problem I got and that I really need to talk to somebody about it. It makes me so depressed and I cry and crying about all the time saying," why can't I be like like everybody else?! Why do I have to be the one to be so negative?!" it even makes me think of suicidal thoughts. I know that was alittle rough for Du to read but I was just being honest. It really does make me wanna give up life but not only cause of the problem. Also for the people I love. The truth is I Liebe life and planet earth and every human being on her. But I be feeling like I don't care but I do care. I pray to him but I feel like I'm not praying hard enough. I feel like I CANT pray hard enough cause I'm just a kid (18 yrs old acually). But to tell Du the truth, sometimes when I pray, I end up crying cause I mean it when I pray but lately when I pray I don't cry. I just cry about the big problem I got. I think I Lost it! Is God displeased of me?! I don't want him to forsaken me! I don't want anybody to forsaken me. I that does happen, then I'm gonna have to give up my life. I just want to do something to make somebody (even a child) happy. But what can I do?! ;'(
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